We've launched the new forums! Read more here

How to control Anger/Blow-ups

I'm not remotely good enough to justify getting upset on the course. When I screw up (quite often) it tends to make me laugh... especially at myself.
 
the_paulo said:
Buy him a book, like Zen Golf, or Golf Is Not A Game Of Perfect. Reading those will help him think rationally
Click to expand...

I was about to make this suggestion too...you beat me to it.

I recently got "golf is not a game of perfect" on audio book. I just have it on my iphone and stick the headphones on while practicing....and then found when I go out on the course I can hear the thoughts/philosophys of the author buzzing through my brain during the round. I had started to get a little frustrated for a few weeks that I wasn't improving at the same rate...this book gave me some real good thoughts which allowed me to relax about my golf, enjoy it more, and actually play better golf!
 
I've come to realize I'm not a pro and don't get to practice/play as much as I used too. When bad shots come or bad day I'll let the 4 letter words fly and then move on to the next shot. Curse the ball for all its worth and just keep on going. If it something that happening over and over again I might bury a club past the hosel or send the wedge at the golfcart as high rate of speed but that hasn't happened in several years. Or it could just be time to get a new club.

Usually its not anger or blowup that ruins a round for me. It's the negative swing thoughts or getting myself in a bad mood that will ruin it. I make myself become disappointed and down and that round goes right down the crapper. I wish I could have a few rounds back where playing a really nice course and couldn't even enjoy it.
 
I quit throwing and slamming clubs because I've come to realize how bad that hurts resale value. If its a club I really hate, I take extra good care of it until I get photos of it and have it sold.
 
A great book EVERY golfer should read is Chicken Soup For The Golfer's Soul. It will put everything in perspective, on and off the course.
 
This has been a pain point for me and my game when it's not going well. Recently I've been reading 'Your 15th Club' by Dr. Bob Rotella and it's really changed my outlook on golf and my game. I've learned or am learning to channel my frustration away better so it doesn't sit with me and consume me. When it does that my game continues to spiral down as does my mood which includes those around me too. I don't want to be Donnie Downer if I can help it. Sarcarsm and laughing at myself is a great way to vent my frustrations now. I'll never be great but if I can be consistent that's fine with me. If I'm not scoring well I can live with that as long as I'm consistent with my swing, etc.
 
I have read the same book ( 'Your 15th Club') Hanks mentioned and it really is a must read book for all THP'ers. I have given up on getting pissed on the golf course as my talent obviously does not warrant throwing a temper fit. One hole at a time and stay in the moment.
 
I used to get angry on the course. To the point that golf just wasn't fun. What helped me was that I was starting to shoot good scores and still having a blow up hole here and there. So after a bad hole I would just tell myself that it's 1 of 18(or 9) and that I could recover. The other day was my first round of the year and I started off +7 after 3 holes. I was able to shake it off and as the round progressed so did my swing. I could have easily folded after that horrendous start.
 
i cannot control it if someone is keeping pushing me, it drives m nuts which happened once last season
 
Dent said:
A harmless move I do is just to find some deep rough, and swing my club through it as hard as I can, that's just a stress reliever for me though and it works.
Click to expand...

I've done that too, but I find that I feel better by not doing anything. Just being like Retief Goosen, Kaymer etc. I think it pays dividends further on as well.

My "key" is to have something between shots (I've said this before). I try to think of something non-golf related, something that makes me happy. It a) relieves stress/pressure and b) keeps you on more of an even keel. The highs don't throw you off your game, nor do the lows destroy your day.
 
I used to have a really bad temper on the golf course. I wouldn't throw clubs or anything like that, but I would just beat myself up over bad shots and wouldn't really look like I was having fun at all. One day a couple of years ago, my dad told me something to the effect of "you're not good enough at golf to get mad over it, just enjoy the game" (I can't remember his exact words). After he said that, I could see that my behavior was having a negative effect on him whenever we played golf together, which made me feel horrible. From that day forward, I changed my attitude on the golf course to try to remember that it's just a game, and I'm privileged to be able to play it. Sure, I'm still hard on myself at times, but now I internalize my feelings, and I let bad shots go after a few seconds. In fact, my dad told me a couple of months ago how my attitude on the golf course had really improved, and he had noticed that. It meant a lot for him to say that to me. To the OP, perhaps if you talk to your dad about how his behavior affects those around him, that may be the impetus for him to change.
 
I'm not good enough yet to lose my temper :) I just take one hole at a time as each hole is different that the snowball effect just cannot happen. At that point, might as well stop playing. When I have a bad shot, now I will take a deep breath and figure out how to make the next shot better :good: believe me, I get so frustrated at golf even during my lessons that I told my Instructor that I wanted to quit. Lol!!


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
 
I used to get mad and swear and throw clubs. I stopped throwing clubs the day I was pissed that I bladed a chip shot and tossed my wedge in the air. It land in the gree. Shaft sticking straight up.

I stopped swearing and getting pissed when my father in law looked at me and flat out said, "Why are you getting so mad? You're not good enough to get mad."
 
"Don't get mad, get better"
That's what my friend's dad says to people who get pissed off during anything.

For me, I honestly don't care about my score enough to get mad. I just go out there and have fun, even if i shoot a million through 9 holes. I just consider it swing practice.
That being said, even in every day life, I'm one to rarely show anger - or any emotion really. This can be a good thing, but it's always a bad thing since things build up and eventually pop. Luckily I haven't popped yet, but who knows, maybe it's coming. I try to adopt a care free attitude to the idiots in life.
 
MarcW said:
A great book EVERY golfer should read is Chicken Soup For The Golfer's Soul. It will put everything in perspective, on and off the course.
Click to expand...

Have not read that book, but I always figured that anyone with anger issues on the golf course have anger issues everywhere they are in life.
 
blugold said:
I used to get mad and swear and throw clubs. I stopped throwing clubs the day I was pissed that I bladed a chip shot and tossed my wedge in the air. It land in the gree. Shaft sticking straight up.

I stopped swearing and getting pissed when my father in law looked at me and flat out said, "Why are you getting so mad? You're not good enough to get mad."
Click to expand...

It all goes back I think to not setting expectations on the course that can not be met.
 
I am usually pretty calm on the course, even when Im having a bad day. Its just not worth getting upset over.

However I think the worst I've ever done was one time out where there was a lot of people on the course. It was the kind of day where you had a group on the green, a group on the fairway and 2 groups waiting to tee off. Well my dad and I were that first group waiting to tee off, with another group behind us. We went off, then drove down to where we hit and waited for the group on the green. Needless to say the guys behind us decided they were just going to go. They hit into us, one of which actually bounced into the side of the cart, the 2nd within 5 yards of the cart.

They didn't yell or anything. I jumped out of the cart, immediatedly yelled what the F*@* is your problem, picked up both of their balls and threw them into the water that separted the hole we were on and one coming back the other way. I think that is probably the worst thing I've done on the course.
 
Last edited:
Swing!

Swing!

After I hit a bad shot or two and am trying my best to hold my composure but just can't do it anymore. I simply just take line up like I'm going to him another ball and take a huge swing at the air. I just put all my anger into one hard golf swing that doesn't count instead of your anger creeping up on your next 2-3 shots and causing a good round to go down the tubes.
 
Had my first real blow-up last weekend while playing golf. Was chipping onto a green from the rough after already taking a penalty for the hole (water). Walked up and didn't even practice swing and chunked the chip 3 feet. Got angry and whacked my putter with my 60* wedge. Now I have a giant dent in the front of my 60*. Made me feel like the worlds biggest DA. :banghead:

It was after that that I made the simple realization that I'm not good enough to be mad at the game. I'm out there playing for fun. No one is judging me and how I shoot. Just relax and have fun with the people around you. Plus if I ever want to explode again, I just have to look at the idiot dent on the front of my 60*. :D
 
mariusvt said:
I am usually pretty calm on the course, even when Im having a bad day. Its just not worth getting upset over.

However I think the worst I've ever done was one time out where there was a lot of people on the course. It was the kind of day where you had a group on the green, a group on the fairway and 2 groups waiting to tee off. Well my dad and I were that first group waiting to tee off, with another group behind us. We went off, then drove down to where we hit and waited for the group on the green. Needless to say the guys behind us decided they were just going to go. They hit into us, one of which actually bounced into the side of the cart, the 2nd within 5 yards of the cart.

They didn't yell or anything. I jumped out of the cart, immediatedly yelled what the F*@* is your problem, picked up both of their balls and threw them into the water that separted the hole we were on and one coming back the other way. I think that is probably the worst thing I've done on the course.
Click to expand...

Always call the clubhouse...
 
littlepingman said:
I quit throwing and slamming clubs because I've come to realize how bad that hurts resale value. If its a club I really hate, I take extra good care of it until I get photos of it and have it sold.
Click to expand...

You said it ping. Last year I was having a really bad day and hit a terrible tee shot. I kind of just one handed the club into the ground infront of me, it hopped up, flipped down the side of the tee box and nailed the cart path. It's all chipped up now and is not re-sellable.

Was just a bad day and i've never done anything like that before.
 
I used to take my anger out by slamming my club down until I saw my son do the same thing and realized how bad it looked.

He is 7 (already a good golfer) and gets angry, frustrated and looses focus easily. So instead of getting mad, I have tried to help him focus on how much more fun a recovery shot will be than a boring approach from the fairway.

Look at players like Phill, Seve and Tiger, what makes them great is their fearlessness, and ability to recover. Bad shots are a chance to hone those skills. If every shot of every round went fairway, GIR, 2 putt no one would play. The occasional bad shots are what make the game so addicting and fun.
 
HoosierGolfer said:
Always call the clubhouse...
Click to expand...

Yea, usually if people are doing crap like that I usually just mention it to the course marshall when I see him roll by. But ultimately the result was out of frustration that day since we were only like 5 holes into a round of 18 and had been on the course for over 2 hours at that point, plus before while we were waiting to tee off they were joking behind us that people would speed up if they were hit into. I even told the marshall what happened on the next hole when he passed by, and I'm pretty sure he asked the guys to leave the course because we didn't see them behind us again the rest of the day.
 
mariusvt said:
Yea, usually if people are doing crap like that I usually just mention it to the course marshall when I see him roll by. But ultimately the result was out of frustration that day since we were only like 5 holes into a round of 18 and had been on the course for over 2 hours at that point, plus before while we were waiting to tee off they were joking behind us that people would speed up if they were hit into. I even told the marshall what happened on the next hole when he passed by, and I'm pretty sure he asked the guys to leave the course because we didn't see them behind us again the rest of the day.
Click to expand...

At my home course a couple of years ago, a group hit into, not once but twice, a group in front made up of longtime members. The second time resulted in balls being hit back to the group behind, which resulted in a face to face confrontation in which punches were thrown.

In the end, the police were called and two people from each group were arrested, charged with assault, and found guilty. At least two of them spent a few weeks in jail. One of the guys in the members group, was given 30 days, spent 15 days in jail and lost a $55,000 a year job over it because he did not have enough vacation time to cover his time in jail. The legal action in having a lawyer represent him cost another $3000.

Because of their involvement in a fight on the course, three of the four members were not allowed to renew their membership. Pretty high price was paid for all and everyone, including the golf course was a looser. Never a good idea to confront anyone on the course.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top