- Joined
- Jan 17, 2018
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- Edmond, Oklahoma (NW OKC)
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I wouldn't put anything past them darn lawyers.
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When Life Rears Back and Kicks You In The Gonads
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- Thread starter
- #77
Yeah I’ve thought of that, it would be entirely unlikely that anyone involved would ever see this, but if it were discovered I’ll stand behind everything I’ve said as it’s been 100% truthful and factual. I certainly have just been trying to explain it, sure it’s probably biased some to my viewpoint, but I’ve tried to explain it as best I can without showing too much anger towards her.
I’m angry at her for the way she went about it and I’m sure there’ll be more of that if this turns into full divorce. I think I’ve said it on here, I’m not going back and it might have just been in PM to someone that’s reached out to me, but I mainly feel sad for her. She’s so depressed and has always blamed me. I hope that she can step up as a mom and not fall back into that cycle again. And if she does I hope that she doesn’t place the blame on any of the kids since I won’t be around to blame.
- Thread starter
- #78
Ok, I got a meeting with her and a neutral party next Wednesday. She met (as I assumed she had) with her lawyer last night and is now willing to sit down and discuss things.
My only interests are my children. If she’s willing to do shared parenting, everything else is gravy. If it’s anything except that, then it’ll have to move to full divorce. If she can agree to that, then we can move on with life going our separate ways. She can keep the stuff she’s already swiped. Don’t even care. I’ll sign over the car she drives to her. No worries. I just want shared parenting. That’s it. My only real request that I even care about.
My only interests are my children. If she’s willing to do shared parenting, everything else is gravy. If it’s anything except that, then it’ll have to move to full divorce. If she can agree to that, then we can move on with life going our separate ways. She can keep the stuff she’s already swiped. Don’t even care. I’ll sign over the car she drives to her. No worries. I just want shared parenting. That’s it. My only real request that I even care about.
God bless you, man. This is so hard to read. I hope things turn your way soon.
Smiter, listen to attorney or mediator. Don’t want to say what to do but I would not offer her the car, hold that for negotiation to get the most important things. You want this too work out best for the kids and you. You want it fair but it is a negotiation and if you hold certain chips then use them in the negotiation when appropriate
This is very good advice. As is being conservative with public discussion and emotion, though to your point and credit you have been.
- Thread starter
- #82
Yup. I’m mainly just thinking out loud here. I’m extremely high on the doubt factor that it matters as in anyone that matters in this situation reading it, but I’ve just been trying to basically say the things that I’ll say to her. I also from the get go, even with that doubt, have written it as if I assume it will be read. Since I’ve quit drinking altogether for now due to the medication interactions, there’s no chance of me posting a late night rant, lol.
I’m willing to bend on possessions, hell she already cleaned me out. But I’m not willing to bend on custody of the kids. I won’t let her screw me over (any more than she already has) either but if she’s reasonable about the kids, that’s truly what I care about.
I know it’s slanted to my view points but anything I’ve stated as fact has been.
There’s no denying this is a really craptastic situation but I’ve got my kids tonight and until 8pm tomorrow. My middle son is playing in his first golf tournament ever on Monday and Tuesday and has a great chance to win the county tournament in his age group. I figured out a way to work my schedule so that I can follow his group both days so I’m stoked about that. So that’s going to be my positive for now.
- Thread starter
- #83
Yeah I’m not offering her the car. I just am not going to take it back at this point. That could change if she is unreasonable and we move to divorce but that would be only at the advice of my attorney. I’m taking no action other than giving it one chance for a peaceful negotiation without it going through him. If she is reasonable I would love to save the likely 8k (each) this will cost otherwise. If she’s not, then I have to proceed that way. I am open to negotiating everything except the kids. I’ve made my wishes clear there and anything else can be worked out.