LPGA: Another Month-Long Wait

Harry Longshanks

ILikeBigPutts&ICannotLie
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Next televised event:

Michelob ULTRA Open at Kingsmill

May 08 : ESPN2
2:00-4:00 PM ET

May 09 : ESPN2
2:00-4:00 PM ET

May 10 : ESPN2
3:00-5:00 PM ET
 
To be fair, there is only one tournament in between now and then, and it's in Mexico in three weeks. Although it would have been nice to see that one too.
 
Then swing north for the Sybase Classic. Looks like I'll be a walking scorer for that one! Plus, I'm taking Boo Girl there for Sunday's round to celebrate her birthday.
 
Then swing north for the Sybase Classic. Looks like I'll be a walking scorer for that one! Plus, I'm taking Boo Girl there for Sunday's round to celebrate her birthday.

It's a good thing the Sybase is at the Upper Montclair C.C. and not the Lower Montclair C.C. - I hear that place is a dump.
 
It's a good thing the Sybase is at the Upper Montclair C.C. and not the Lower Montclair C.C. - I hear that place is a dump.

That's more than the rest of us know about it. Maybe it's closer to Montclair than is the U.M.C.C.?
 
That's more than the rest of us know about it. Maybe it's closer to Montclair than is the U.M.C.C.?


I was kidding. I just find labels like that humorous. They just sound like someone put them there to sound snotty.
 
I was kidding. I just find labels like that humorous. They just sound like someone put them there to sound snotty.

I know. The irony is that there is an Upper Montclair, but it's less prestigious than Montclair. And still not near the course.

Upper Spanaway Country Club, anyone?
 
Upper Spanaway Country Club, anyone?


uh, no.

Spoiler
Spanaway Man Accused Of Having Sex With Dog

PIERCE COUNTY, Wash. -- A man accused of having sex with the family dog has been charged under the state's new animal cruelty law, which makes bestiality a felony, a prosecutor said.

Michael Patrick McPhail, 26, of nearby Spanaway, pleaded not guilty Thursday to one count of first-degree animal cruelty in Pierce County Superior Court.

Assistant Pierce County Prosecutor Karen Watson said McPhail was the first person in Pierce County to be charged with the new bestiality offense.

She said the dog was taken by animal control.

McPhail posted $20,000 bail on Friday.

Judge Katherine Stolz has set a trial date of Dec. 11.

McPhail's wife told investigators that she found her husband on their back porch Wednesday night having intercourse with their 4-year-old female pit bull terrier, the Pierce County sheriff's office report said. The dog was squealing and crying, according to charging papers.

The woman took photos with her cell phone and called the sheriff's office.

Calls to McPhail's public defender, David Katayama, were not immediately returned Friday.

The bestiality law, which took effect in June, was prompted by a case near Enumclaw in which a Seattle man died after having sex with a horse. Before the law was enacted, Washington was one of 14 states where bestiality had not been explicitly prohibited.
 
Oh my freaking gawd. Poor wife. Poor puppy.
 
Oh my freaking gawd. Poor wife. Poor puppy.

This is the part that worries me about the wife.

McPhail's wife told investigators that she found her husband on their back porch . . .

The woman took photos with her cell phone and called the sheriff's office.
Not scream, not bludgeon the dude with the nearest object, but take photos.
Hmmmmm...
 
This is the part that worries me about the wife.

Not scream, not bludgeon the dude with the nearest object, but take photos.
Hmmmmm...

She has her divorce lawyer on speed dial.

Oh, wait--Washington is a community property state.

She's a total dope and she has her lawyer on speed dial.
 
She has her divorce lawyer on speed dial.

Oh, wait--Washington is a community property state.

She's a total dope and she has her lawyer on speed dial.

Do you really think that a 26-year old guy in Spanaway who farks his pit bull on the back porch has any assets?
 
That would probably be the ad litem lawyer assigned to handle her various civil protective orders.

Edit: Hardy har. On reflection, legal humor is never a good play.
 
Do you really think that a 26-year old guy in Spanaway who farks his pit bull on the back porch has any assets?

Okay, she thought she could sell the photos for big bucks.

That would probably be the ad litem lawyer assigned to handle her various civil protective orders.

Edit: Hardy har. On reflection, legal humor is never a good play.

Legal humor = contradiction in terms.

What do you call 10,000 lawyers jumping out of airplanes without parachutes?

A good start.
 
I wished the LPGA had more televised events.
 
I spit beer all over my keyboard.
 
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