We've launched the new forums! Read more here

Corona Virus/COVID19: Lighten The Mood?

20149132_26_600_816.jpg
 
beer.jpg
 
A rookie police officer pulled a biker over for speeding and had the following exchange:
• Officer: May I see your driver's license?
• Biker: I don't have one. I had it suspended when I got my 5th DUI.
• Officer: May I see the owner's card for this vehicle?
• Biker: It's not my bike. I stole it.
• Officer: The motorcycle is stolen?
• Biker: That's right. But come to think of it, I think I saw the owner's card in the tool bag when I was putting my gun in there.
Officer: There's a gun in the tool bag?
• Biker: Yes sir. That's where I put it after I shot and killed the dude who owns this bike and stuffed his dope in the saddle bags.
• Officer: There's drugs in the saddle bags too?!?!?
• Biker: Yes, sir. Hearing this, the rookie immediately called his captain. The biker was quickly surrounded by police, and the captain approached the biker to handle the tense situation:
• Captain: Sir, can I see your license?
• Biker: Sure. Here it is. It was valid.
• Captain: Who's motorcycle is this?
• Biker: It's mine, officer. Here's the registration.
• Captain: Could you slowly open your tool bag so I can see if there's a gun in it?
• Biker: Yes, sir, but there's no gun in it. Sure enough, there was nothing in the tool bag.
• Captain: Would you mind opening your saddle bags? I was told you said there's drugs in them.
• Biker: No problem. The saddle bags were opened; no drugs.
• Captain: I don't understand it. The officer who stopped you said you told him you didn't have a license, stole this motorcycle, had a gun in the tool bag, and that there were drugs in the saddle bags.
• Biker: Yeah, I'll bet he told you I was speeding, too.
 
Hillary Clinton calls Bill and says...
"Hey, I just heard that Ruth Bader Ginsberg has died, do you mind if I take her place?"
Bill says...
"Go right ahead, but let me call the funeral home first."
 
testing.jpg
 
FB_IMG_1589457028041.jpg
FB_IMG_1589238262087.jpg
FB_IMG_1589072830811.jpg
FB_IMG_1589164869595.jpg
FB_IMG_1589058642052.jpg
FB_IMG_1588941570517.jpg
 
weekrankie.jpg

For all you Scottish Nationalists out there.
 
Curiosity.jpg
 
EY-Pf3SUYAILSO8
 
The “don’t touch your face” stuff reminds me of my time on Parris Island. Touching your face was highly frowned upon there.

D3D92B5C-F190-4996-9EBE-C929EB2D1622.jpeg
 
Last edited:
Pr3cision said:
The “don’t touch your face” stuff reminds me of my time on Parris Island. Touching your face was highly frowned upon there.

View attachment 8946179
Click to expand...

Yea except it’s some 300lb minister of health telling you not to do it and how to eat these days. Or some ghoul posing as director of national institute of health. The jokes on us at this point...
 
maxresdefault.jpg
 
e8064e2c-9a0a-49a0-8e6e-2ff600329846.jpg
 
I heard a new term this morning at the golf course for those who choose not to wear a mask in public - they shall be referred to as "Branch Covidians"
 
ummmm-yeah-youre-87ba2f90c7.jpg
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top