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He's 380 out because he just hit his best tee shot of the day that went 220 yards... But you know, he may really get hold of this one.
Funny things on the course that make you laugh to yourself?
kappa1032
Member
I'm with you on this one. I see more often someone 275 yards away waiting 5 minutes for the green to clear and channel their inner Rory, followed by a 10 yard duff. You have to laugh to keep from crying, right?
- Joined
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Don’t forget There’s water on the right and bunkers on the left and they have about 20 yards in between the two to thread the ball between. Been spraying it all over the course, but yea, I have that shot in the bag.
Look up images of "golf ball saguaro."
Similar to the electrical box earlier.....seeing the poor saguaros just off the tee boxes packed full of golf balls.
Similar to the electrical box earlier.....seeing the poor saguaros just off the tee boxes packed full of golf balls.
lazychicken
Active member
There is a hilarious (and not unattractive) cart girl who has worked several courses here in North Texas and we keep running into her. We remember her mostly for the very stout Crown&Cokes she poured when we first met her (in fact, our nickname for her is based on that). But my favorite memory of her was once we had another buddy playing with us and he was losing weight and watching his carbs and calories closely. He ordered a Michelob Ultra right there in front of all his buddies and she immediately shot back "I think I have some Virginia Slims here if you want those as well". Aaaaaand extra tip for you, Miss.
Watching anyone other than me eat sand on a shot.
As far as craziness funny, it kills me how intense some people are about who's playing what ball, and the markings on them. I don't know how many weird conversations I've had this year on course about this. Especially with older guys. We are not going to get our balls confused, Mr 170 Off The Tee 20cap. I'm not going to Sharpie mine with some random sh*t so the world makes sense to you. Put a 5th dot on yours if you need the peace of mind that I won't accidentally play your ball and end life as we know it. It's sounds kind of dick-ish when I write it out like that, but man some people are weird about it, and I'm just laughing inside at the amount of energy they're devoting to it.
As far as craziness funny, it kills me how intense some people are about who's playing what ball, and the markings on them. I don't know how many weird conversations I've had this year on course about this. Especially with older guys. We are not going to get our balls confused, Mr 170 Off The Tee 20cap. I'm not going to Sharpie mine with some random sh*t so the world makes sense to you. Put a 5th dot on yours if you need the peace of mind that I won't accidentally play your ball and end life as we know it. It's sounds kind of dick-ish when I write it out like that, but man some people are weird about it, and I'm just laughing inside at the amount of energy they're devoting to it.
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BanjoSaysWoof
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In no order:
1) the angry guy... Never met one whose skill justifies his anger.
2) the guy who hits on cart girl... like really you’re hitting on her? She’s heard it before dude. Let her work.
3) when an animal noise ruins a shot. It’s funny every time because I’m imagining a hostile woodpecker who is bitter about no longer being a dinosaur exacting his revenge in the only way he can.
4) people who embrace their suck... I have a friend who after digging a ball completely will start applauding, or saying things like “man the wind really knocked that down. Should have clubbed up” after tpping it and it going 8 feet. I am kind of hoping he messes up because he really gets into making everyone laugh.
these things make me laugh a lot on the course. Angry person rarely likes it when I laugh but I honestly couldn’t care less.
1) the angry guy... Never met one whose skill justifies his anger.
2) the guy who hits on cart girl... like really you’re hitting on her? She’s heard it before dude. Let her work.
3) when an animal noise ruins a shot. It’s funny every time because I’m imagining a hostile woodpecker who is bitter about no longer being a dinosaur exacting his revenge in the only way he can.
4) people who embrace their suck... I have a friend who after digging a ball completely will start applauding, or saying things like “man the wind really knocked that down. Should have clubbed up” after tpping it and it going 8 feet. I am kind of hoping he messes up because he really gets into making everyone laugh.
these things make me laugh a lot on the course. Angry person rarely likes it when I laugh but I honestly couldn’t care less.
I've a friend who for unknown reason takes these huge divots when he's trying to hit a ball of the turf. Some of these divots are really deep. My comment to him a number of times is, "Is that Chinese I hear coming out of that hole". 
jpotas
Well-known member
Laughing at work right now, one of the best I've heard!!
Watching other golfers emulate pros on the green are equal parts hilarious and frustrating! I saw someone take at least three minutes to figure out a putt (crouch, plumb-bob, check from all sides, line up ball), then observe him miss the hole by at least 10 feet. I actually busted out laughing on the tee box.I laugh to myself when playing behind a player or group that is having a hard time hitting the ball 50 yards due to hitting thin or fat. Then when finally on the green, starts reading it like a pro would, viewing from all angles, crouches down, holds putter up vertically in front of himself, then proceeds to 3 or more putts to finally finish the hole.
Seeing a shot go backwards. In increasing hilarity order...
1) Due to a tree
2) Due to a man made object (cart, pipe, oil rig, ball washer, etc.)
3) Due to an extremely chunked tee shot that goes straight up and spins backwards
I'm not normally one to laugh at someone's misfortune, but i've seen all of the above (and done most of them) and it gets me every time!
1) Due to a tree
2) Due to a man made object (cart, pipe, oil rig, ball washer, etc.)
3) Due to an extremely chunked tee shot that goes straight up and spins backwards
I'm not normally one to laugh at someone's misfortune, but i've seen all of the above (and done most of them) and it gets me every time!
I don't know if it's funny or sad, but when I see guys my age (almost 65), or a bit younger, hitting on the cart girl. As if they have any kind of shot. They are simply embarrassing themselves.
Following a slow group and one in the group is 275 out on a par 5 and he waits for the green to clear when he hasn’t even sniffed 200 off the tee. Then proceeds to top it and it might make 100 yards with rollout. Both maddening and funny.
One course I play all the time has a fairly busy road 25 yards behind 8’s tee box. It cracks me up when someone driving by honks in the middle of someone (else’s) backswing or rolls down there window and yells “fore!!”
I don’t find it so humerous when it happens to me, but I can’t recall ever whiffing because of it. I’m sure that I’ve blamed it on a bad shot before, whether it was due to that or not I don’t know.
I don’t find it so humerous when it happens to me, but I can’t recall ever whiffing because of it. I’m sure that I’ve blamed it on a bad shot before, whether it was due to that or not I don’t know.
Seems like I see this way to offer, people throw their ball forward out of the Sand Trap. Now I haven’t read a rule book so I’m not aware of this rule and who it applies to.
It’s under ruling 16.4 “Hey Jim-Bob, get over here and hold my beer while I get my ball out of this here dayum bunker”
I always have a chuckle to myself when 3 ugly, sweat stained dudes (like myself) actually think the smoking hot 19yo cart girl is going to be swept of her feet by their tired lines.
Also I get pretty entertained by parking lot handicap guy. Every week its 6 strokes different and thinks hes fooling everyone.
Also I get pretty entertained by parking lot handicap guy. Every week its 6 strokes different and thinks hes fooling everyone.
But she's sure to like me if I tip a fiver on that $10 order.
But if he doesn't wait he kills it and drops the ball right in the middle of the group....the shot of a lifetime!
Same thing happens when you finally get the group ahead of you to play through. You know you're topping that tee shot for a total distance of 45 yards! Of course you know they're thinking, "Yeah, youre so much better than us" (eyerolls) No you Richardhead, I just play bad golf faster than you!
I’m one of those rare guys that can’t win. I have (or rather had) the distance to get home from 275-300 yards on a par 5, but not the consistency. I was in a lose/lose. If I hit while they’re putting I will hit a great shot. If I wait for it to clear I’ll skull that sucker and roll it out 150 yards. My solution was if there was any chance of flying it into them, I’d wait. If I caught that one perfect contact shot of the nine and “may” roll it into them, I would go ahead and hit.
My oldest boy is wildly inconsistent but has a low 120’s CHS. He hit into a par 5 from about 290 uphill and there was an old guys group on the green (we knew one of them pretty well). He flushed it, just a dead straight bullet right at the green. By the time we get up there the green was cleared and he found his ball sitting on the the back fringe sitting up on a tee. At first he was amazed “how did I hit my ball onto a tee??” Then he asked if he had to play it as it lied, lol. I chuckled for a bit and explained how and why it was sitting on the tee.
I spoke to the older gent that we knew well after the round and explained that it was literally a 1/100+ shot for him and apologized. He said no worries it was a great shot it just ticked one of the guys in the group off as he was putting as the ball landed just short of the green and rolled through it.
Yeah, that’s why he missed the putt.
I had this happen to me. Dogleg right par 5 around a lake. I had too much draw on the tee shot and it rolled about 5 yds into the trees on the off side but exactly in the dogleg turn. I get up there and the ball is sitting pretty on the pine needles with a straight shot to the green. There is a foursome up on the green and I estimate it's about 265-270. I pull my 3W and my cart partner says: Awww, go ahead and hit. As instructed, I hit the shot, not grounding the club in the hazard. Absolutely pure'd it! As my eye caught the ball in flight, my 1st thought was Oh Sh!t! and... I forgot to yell FORE!!! My ball hits just a few yards before the front of the green with a Thwap!, bounces and releases and rolls right through the foursome, about 8' behind the pin. I'm still in the trees and I yell SORRY!!!!!! I watched one of the guys in the foursome kick my ball off the green. Lesson learned.
Later, I got to talk to one of the foursome and apologized. He said, at first they didn't know where the ball came from and the ball impact sound startled them. They didn't see me back in the trees until I yelled Sorrry. He said they had one crotchety guy in their group and he kicked my ball off the green. He told me what a great shot I hit and not to worry, it never presented any danger to them as it rolled through them and past the pin.
lazychicken
Active member
I totally agree and chuckle for the same reason, at least as long as it is obvious she's not buying what he's selling. But, unfortunately, I actually know 2 separate situations where golfer dude landed the cart girl, destroyed his family, etc. Naturally those are a lot less funny.
There is a cart girl at our club now and, yes, she's young and pretty and has figured out all she has to do is smile and her tip dollars go up (so she's smart). But she also played golf in college and is on the WAPT/Symetra tour now. So it's hilarious how intimidating it is when she pulls up and patiently watches your buddy duff an easy mid-iron that you've seen him crush 1000 times. One thing I say all the time when someone is upset that they hit a bad shot - "There's a reason we didn't get a call to play on the Tour this week". Obviously I mean it's "because we're just not very good golfers". But I guess I could also mean "because all it takes for our round to fall apart is to have one pretty girl watching us".
Drunk people make me laugh to myself on the course.
My son and I played a round back in July and it was hot as hell and humid. We were both chugging water and Gatorade the whole time. We came up on 16 which is a par 3 and we see a twosome under a tree sitting in the mulch, Indian style. They muttered something at us and waved us through. We had no idea what was going on. I teed up my ball and in my backswing a slurred "goo shart!" was yelled (good shot for sober folks). Before we headed to the green...we offered some water and both declined saying they had found the secret which was 3 beers and then 1 gatorade. I dont know if they finished or passed away right there but we still laugh about how ****faced they both were.
My son and I played a round back in July and it was hot as hell and humid. We were both chugging water and Gatorade the whole time. We came up on 16 which is a par 3 and we see a twosome under a tree sitting in the mulch, Indian style. They muttered something at us and waved us through. We had no idea what was going on. I teed up my ball and in my backswing a slurred "goo shart!" was yelled (good shot for sober folks). Before we headed to the green...we offered some water and both declined saying they had found the secret which was 3 beers and then 1 gatorade. I dont know if they finished or passed away right there but we still laugh about how ****faced they both were.