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Great TV/Movie quotes

"None shall pass!" Black Knight

Monty Python and the Holy Grail.
 
Joe Dirt

Joe Dirt: So you're gonna tell me that you don't have no black cats, no Roman Candles, or screaming mimis?
Kicking Wing: No.
Joe Dirt: Oh come on, man. You got no lady fingers, fuzz buttles, snicker bombs, church burners, finger blasters, gut busters, zippity do das, or crap flappers?
Kicking Wing: No, I don't.
Joe Dirt: You're gonna stand there, ownin' a fireworks stand, and tell me you don't have no whistlin' bungholes, no spleen splitters, whisker biscuits, honkey lighters, hoosker doos, hoosker don'ts, cherry bombs, nipsy daisers, with or without the scooter stick, or one single whistlin' kitty chaser?
Kicking Wing: No... because snakes and sparklers are the only ones I like.
Joe Dirt: Well that might be your problem, it's not what you like, it's the consumer.
 
SethO said:
"None shall pass!" Black Knight

Monty Python and the Holy Grail.
Click to expand...

Your mother was a hampster and your father smelt like elderberries.

I wave my private parts at you you silly english pig-dog
 
"You have no marbles!" -- Major League

Any quote by Will Ferrell, Vince Vaughn, or John C. Reily. About a million come to mind..

"That was my first Asian!" -- Wedding Crashers
 
"that is one big....JOHNSON!"

"that looks like a....WEINER!"

Austin Powers
 
I can't believe more people haven't used quotes from Wedding Crashers, Anchorman, the Hangover, etc.

I am laughing out loud at work just thinking about them.
 
Anita: My name's Anita. What's yours?
Bruce: They call me Bruce.
Anita: Bruce? Like Bruce Lee.
Bruce: Of course.
Anita: Then you must know kung fu.
Bruce: Yes, I stepped in some yesterday.

they call me bruce
 
"Kneel before Zod!"--Superman
 
"The Snozzberries taste like Snozzberries" - Super Troopers
 
Alan: Tigers love pepper... they hate cinnamon.

Brian Fantana: They've done studies, you know. 60% of the time it works, every time.

Chazz Reinhold: What is she doing back there? I never know what she's doing.

There's a few.
 
thanks1974 said:
"Kneel before Zod!"--Superman
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thats a good one "son of jorel..." "why do you say this... when you know i will kill you for it"

"where are my cards..." - kill or be killed
 
from Anchorman:

"last night i sh*t a squirrel".........."i think i ate your chocolate covered squirrel"
 
"What's a bath without Bubbles?!?...hey Bubbles....come over here!"- Back to School
 
Hawkeye: (waking up with a hangover; talking in a normal voice) Trapper? Trapper?
Trapper: (also waking up with a hangover) I'm not gonna talk unless you stop screaming. M*A*S*H; The Incubator
 
'Negative Ghost Rider the Pattern is Full--Top Gun
 
"Crabcakes and football! That's what Maryland is all about!"
 
What you know you can't explain but you feel it. You've felt it your entire life, that there's something wrong with the world. You don't know what it is, but it's there, like a splinter in your mind, driving you mad.


The Matrix
 
Tattoo on the lower back? Might as well be a bullseye.


The Wedding Crashers
 
bogey_russ said:
big wormmmm
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Friday After Next:

Santa Claus: Gimme that watch!
Uncle Elroy: Oh, no. Not the Rolex!
Santa Claus: Now its a Stolex. Looking like a Mississippi pimp.
..... better have my sweet potatoes. Ho, ho, ho, mother...

Tastes so good, make you wanna slap yo momma!

Money Mike: I am a boy! You are not in prison anymore Damon! Thats not how we do it!

Wedding Crashers:

Chas Reinhold: MA! THE MEATLOAF! WE WANT IT NOW!

Old School:

Frank: (With a tranquilizer dart in his neck) You're crazy man.. You're crazy.. I like you, but you're crazy..

Frank: Anything? Well, uh I guess I, deep down, am feeling a little confused. I mean, suddenly, you get married, and you're supposed to be this entirely different guy. I don't feel different. I mean, take yesterday for example. We were out at the Olive Garden for dinner, which was lovely. And uh, I happen to look over at a certain point during the meal and see a waitress taking an order, and I found myself wondering what color her underpants might be. Her panties. Uh, odds are they are probably basic white, cotton, underpants. But I sort of think well maybe they're silk panties, maybe it's a thong. Maybe it's something really cool that I don't even know about. You know, and uh, and I started feeling... what? what I thought we were in the trust tree in the nest, were we not?
 
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You better decide whether you're hanging on the cross or banging the nails.

-Edge of Darkness (Mel Gibson)


Porter: [voiceover] Not many people know what their life's worth is. I do. Seventy grand. That's what they took from me. And that's what I was going to get back.

Porter: We went for breakfast... in Canada. We made a deal; if she'd stop hookin', I'd stop shooting people. [pause] Maybe we were aiming high.

-Payback
 
"the first rule of fight club, there is no fight club!"
 
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