The affects of on course "negative" attitude.

UberPete

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My teenaged son is athletic and competitive in a variety of sports. While this gives him drive to improve, it is also a big source of frustration for him as he learn golf and struggles with inconsistencies or problems he can't readily fix.

I remind him of PGA players that have bad holes (Tiger's 10 on a par 3 in a Master's I think?) and suggest that he set small goals (one good drive, one good approach, one good putt over the nine holes, for example.) If he gets that one good drive, then the 9 was a success, and next time he can set the goal at 2. The goals increase but remain achievable relative to his level of play.

Basically, make the focus the few really good shots, instead of the numerous imperfect ones.

I encourage him not to look at hole par or keep score when he is struggling. Instead, focus on keeping the ball on the fairway. If you drive out if bounds, a success on the next shot is an easy chip onto the fairway, rather than trying to blast it to the green.

Last, I make a rule that if he wants to talk about what happened on a hole, he MUST start by saying something positive, eg " I had a decent drive/chip/finish but..." I find that helps not to spread the negative stress to me and others and I think it stops him from a negative spiral.
 

FairwayGreen

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Positivity leads to huge results on the course
So much this. I've started +7 thru 3 and ended +6 total for the round before. I've had buddies even at the turn and then make 2-3 bogies in a row and just lose their marbles, coming in with 44 or something. Positive attitude, shaking off bad shots, and a general "not give a crap" demeanor really helps minimize damage on bad days.
 

RatFink

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Rule 17b - laugh at the bad shots.
This is all I say to myself when things don't go quite as planned, and learn from it.
 

Snickerdog

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You can't help a persons negative attitude. If it gets bad enough I just ignore them until they come around or remind them we aren't playing on Sunday on TV. I actually quit playing with a guy it got so bad with attitude and club throwing.
 

Luchnia

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Thanks for all the great responses. Gives me some things to think about. Funny how a person's attitude can make such a difference for others.

Played today with my youngest son and another friend and such a difference from yesterday's negativity to today's positive attitudes. Even though our scores were not record breaking, it was so much fun because we were relaxed and so enjoyed our day.

We marveled at the good shots and laughed at the bad ones. Amazing how different golf is when we can laugh at our mistakes and simply play and enjoy the game.
 

PatsFan

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I have been that guy (I am super competitive even with myself) But never again! Now I just try to stay positive and focus on making the next shot a good one.
I always say to myself, SELF don't turn 1 bad shot into 2 or 3. I also just try to focus on the next shot, It's a lot like playing poker.
If your focused on the last shot or hand your not focused on this one and this one is the one that matters.

Sometimes a Joke can help. Sometimes we are just in our own heads and having a buddy make me laugh is all it takes.
But you have to know if he can take the joke or is it just going to piss him off further???
 
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Sean

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I play/practice every day...unless I am sick. Golf seems to be an activity where the work you put in doesn't necessarily translate to the results you would expect with all that work. For example, if you took piano lessons you would see steady improvement over time, unlike golf where getting better can seem to be glacial.

I just accept what golf gives me on any given day, and am just grateful that I can still play.

Yes, it's no fun playing with an individual who get's Po'd after a poor shot, and curses, stomps around, and even throw a club. It can ruin the round for his playing partners. I had a friend who was like that and one day I told him I couldn't play golf with him anymore as his attitude was ruining it for me. A couple of months later we went out and played and his attitude had done a 180º.
 

Daddio

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I've always been very positive on the golf course myself but see negativity completely derail playing partners (and even suck the fun out of the entire 4some) way too often. I don't get it because negativity never seems to help anyone play better, but it's a go to for some guys.

I'm somewhat ashamed to admit this. I bet I've told 50+ people about THP. I carry those logo'd Epoch tees so I can hand out something with the webs address when I run into someone I think would enjoy the site. Yet I've never once mentioned THP to my little brother. He gets so negative, so fast, and over the least little thing (IMO), that I just don't want to risk him sucking the fun from other THPers at any informal gatherings or events. Hoped he might get a bit better about it when I discussed how positivity led to a couple extremely fluky pars in the round we had just played. We had a few hours to talk since we were driving from his home turf in Wichita to my place in SW Mizzou. No Bueno - his take away was that I'm just lucky (I was on those) but he remained completely oblivious to THE POINT. I couldn't have possibly 'gotten lucky' if I'd immediately defaulted to negative after the preceding bad break or shot:(.
 
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