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Mental Game is killing me

L

Lost Golfer

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I’ve posted on here before about my lack of a mental game. At the risk of being called out for doing it before, I thought I’d try again. I’ve tried reading the suggested books and it doesn’t seem to be helping. I’m a mental midget on the course. I go to the range and hit it great and can very rarely bring it to the course. My concentration level is very low and I seem to always press. I just can’t seem to relax and yet focus. I know I can hit the shots but rarely seem to pull them off. They say to focus on good shots but in the back of my mind I’m always expecting the disaster. And most of the time I’m right. Anyone else had this problem and if so do you have any suggestions on what to do? I’m at my wit’s end. I know it’s a process but I’m looking to do something over the winter to help. Thank you!!!!!!! And I’m sorry if I am offending anyone by asking for this again.
 
You are just plain thinking too much. I try to maintain one swing thought and clear everything else out my head. I don't worry about it if I hit a bad shot. I am not a pro and will never be as consistent as a pro. One thought. It might be light hands, swing easy, in to out, etc. Just don't try to think about so much.
 
I know I can hit the shots but rarely seem to pull them off. They say to focus on good shots but in the back of my mind I’m always expecting the disaster. And most of the time I’m right.
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This tells me your expectations may be out of whack with your ability. If you're sitting there thinking "OK. I know I can hit a 6-iron. All I have to do is make sure I clear the water hazard, carry the front bunker, hit it close to that tucked-left pin without going too far left where I would go OB. Damn it! Why do I suck so bad?" then my hypothesis is likely correct.

You have to pick shots you can execute 80% of the time and where you won't be in major trouble even if you don't execute it. Depending on your ability level, that may mean not even going for the green in regulation.

I know I can hit a 6-iron to a tucked pin. I've done it before. Maybe once. Would I consciously try to do it? No way. I would evaluate the shot by saying "where do I want to be if I miss?" That may be short-right. So instead of the 6-iron, I'll pull a 7-iron and aim for the front right of the green. If I pull it, cool, I'm in the center of the green. If hit it where I intend, I'm on the front right. If I push it, I'm farther away on the front right with lots of green to work with. I can make an aggressive swing at a conservative target and still walk happily up to my ball even if I didn't hit it perfectly.

As another example, if you don't hit your tee shot great, you may pull your 3-wood or 4-iron and then get angry when you top it. If you don't think you can hit your 3-wood well 80% of the time, maybe a couple 7-irons might be a better choice.

When it's time to hit the shot, the only thing in your mind should be to swing towards your target effortlessly. If you do that and the shot doesn't come off, you simply go find it and try again.
 
If you are not having fun, stop playing.

Try taking only a 7-iron to the course, along with a putter. Don't keep score. Just hit balls down the fairway. Then putt.

It sounds like your expectation is what's causing the issue.
 
To be fair you just have to accept that the vast majority of your shots will be a disaster and go from there.
 
wadesworld said:
This tells me your expectations may be out of whack with your ability. If you're sitting there thinking "OK. I know I can hit a 6-iron. All I have to do is make sure I clear the water hazard, carry the front bunker, hit it close to that tucked-left pin without going too far left where I would go OB. Damn it! Why do I suck so bad?" then my hypothesis is likely correct.

You have to pick shots you can execute 80% of the time and where you won't be in major trouble even if you don't execute it. Depending on your ability level, that may mean not even going for the green in regulation.

I know I can hit a 6-iron to a tucked pin. I've done it before. Maybe once. Would I consciously try to do it? No way. I would evaluate the shot by saying "where do I want to be if I miss?" That may be short-right. So instead of the 6-iron, I'll pull a 7-iron and aim for the front right of the green. If I pull it, cool, I'm in the center of the green. If hit it where I intend, I'm on the front right. If I push it, I'm farther away on the front right with lots of green to work with. I can make an aggressive swing at a conservative target and still walk happily up to my ball even if I didn't hit it perfectly.

As another example, if you don't hit your tee shot great, you may pull your 3-wood or 4-iron and then get angry when you top it. If you don't think you can hit your 3-wood well 80% of the time, maybe a couple 7-irons might be a better choice.

When it's time to hit the shot, the only thing in your mind should be to swing towards your target effortlessly. If you do that and the shot doesn't come off, you simply go find it and try again.
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Middle of the fairway, middle of the green.
 
ShortStickShaman said:
If you are not having fun, stop playing.
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this is so true. it's a trap i fall into often: expectations =/= reality. as soon as i start playing some decent golf, i expect it to happen every single time i go out. but as soon as i accept that it's ok if i shoot 90, i generally play better.

for me, "mental game" means managing expectations. if i EXPECT to come up short with a 5w in my hand from 230, and there's trouble in front, don't hit that club. there is ALWAYS another option. if i don't have a flop game, don't hit a flop; play away from the pin to the fat part of the green and try to two-putt. that's better than chunking one then shanking the next then getting on the green THEN two-putting.
 
Just go out and have fun. Nothing that is of real import is riding on each and every golf shot. Go out, relax, enjoy the camaraderie, the scenery, and when you hit a shot just visualize yourself on the driving range.
 
The early part of the season I dealt with mental problems. What really worked was looking to where you want the ball to go and not where you think the ball will go. Sounds simple but it's tough to fool the mind. Keep focused on where your target is and don't break your pre-shot routine.
I also did some reading and at first tried to remember what I read standing over a shot which made it worse but now when I now approach the ball or stand over the ball what I read subliminally pops up in a good way. Now the positive thoughts are part of my pre-shot routine.
Don't think my mental state is all good by any means. I can still f-up a good round but it's a heck of a lot better than 4 months ago.
 
You care too much, or rather, you care too much about the wrong thing.

Results surely matter but if all that matters to you is the result, well, considering the long journey that is one's golf game, you may have chosen the wrong game entirely.

Recalibrate and reassess, learn to enjoy the process. Rather than using the course as some sort of assessment test, use it instead as your personal range. Adopt the mentality that the course offers possibility rather than consequence.

And stop keeping score and save yourself from its assigned judgement, just play the game in it's purest form, for the love of it. If you're just out by yourself shooting some hoops, for example, do you actually keep count of your field-goal percentage? Of course not.

Treat playing golf as the practice that it is rather than the individual tournament you're very likely making it to be. Stop criticizing your play before you've ever even learned to "play" in its purest, most innocent form.

Learn to make shots, strategize and manage play. THEN keep score, but only as a periodic unit of measurement.

In other words... chill, dude.
 
Have you tried taking 5000mg vitamin D? You may want to try it, it can help quiet your mind and make you more focused.
 
Wow man ...way too intense

Chill

Try not to think of a pink elephant ... Didn't work right,
Guess what happens if you try not to hit it a bad shot.

My suggestion, go out and just play for fun, don't even score. Experiment and see what works for you.

Visualise a good shot and try to hit it. Have no expectations, just observe.

And If it isn't fun, stop and go do something that is.

Sent from my Lenovo P2a42 using Tapatalk
 
chriso97 said:
Wow man ...way too intense

Chill

Try not to think of a pink elephant ... Didn't work right,
Guess what happens if you try not to hit it a bad shot.

My suggestion, go out and just play for fun, don't even score. Experiment and see what works for you.

Visualise a good shot and try to hit it. Have no expectations, just observe.

And If it isn't fun, stop and go do something that is.

Sent from my Lenovo P2a42 using Tapatalk
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My problem is that I played other sports and excelled at them. This golf thing keeps getting worse. I know I can hit the shots but I have performance failure. I’m not talking about drawing a 6 iron into a tight pin shots, just normal fairways and middle of the green shots. I really enjoy the guys I play with and the scenery but I always seem to screw up the basic shots. It’s just really frustrating. For example, the first hole at my club is a 385 yard par 4 with a creek about 100 yards in front of the tee that continues down the left side of the hole for approx. 200 yards. Approximately 75% of the time I hit my opening tee shot into that creek. It’s unbelievable. I’ve taken many lessons and seem to be regressing.
 
Tadashi70 said:
Have you tried taking 5000mg vitamin D? You may want to try it, it can help quiet your mind and make you more focused.
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I'm sure you meant 5,000 IU. 5,000 mg could possibly be fatal (not that you could find a dose that size. It's early and I'm tired but I think 5000 iu converts to .125 mg.
 
SmiterOfPv1x said:
I'm sure you meant 5,000 IU. 5,000 mg could possibly be fatal (not that you could find a dose that size. It's early and I'm tired but I think 5000 iu converts to .125 mg.
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Omg, yes I meant IU. It was early and the caffeine hadn’t yet hit the ole brain.
 
Lost Golfer said:
My problem is that I played other sports and excelled at them. This golf thing keeps getting worse. I know I can hit the shots but I have performance failure. I’m not talking about drawing a 6 iron into a tight pin shots, just normal fairways and middle of the green shots. I really enjoy the guys I play with and the scenery but I always seem to screw up the basic shots. It’s just really frustrating. For example, the first hole at my club is a 385 yard par 4 with a creek about 100 yards in front of the tee that continues down the left side of the hole for approx. 200 yards. Approximately 75% of the time I hit my opening tee shot into that creek. It’s unbelievable. I’ve taken many lessons and seem to be regressing.
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I know the feeling ... We've all been there, there's a hole on a course I used to play that runs parallel to the river ... OB all along left edge of the fairway. Its a killer.

Golf sometimes feels counter intuitive, the harder you try the worse it gets. You need to just find "flow" and relax. Tension is a swing killer, hence why we can hit balls on the range.





Sent from my Lenovo P2a42 using Tapatalk
 
Tadashi70 said:
Omg, yes I meant IU. It was early and the caffeine hadn’t yet hit the ole brain.
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Lol first THP advice related death avoided :)

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chriso97 said:
Lol first THP advice related death avoided :)

Sent from my Lenovo P2a42 using Tapatalk
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Lol ?! Vitamin D (in moderate doses:))= good.

Caffeine= gooder
 
What do you do when you go to the range? Do you just hit shots and not worry about where they go as it is wide open, or do you pick specific targets to aim at?

At the range I use, they have markers at various yardages and I use them as my imaginary fairway - by setting targets and limits you are subconsciously putting the same pressure on yourself that you have when out on the course, the biggest difference being that on the course you will have trees or water on either side of your fairway

It is very easy to get into a groove at the range and stripe balls all day long, but by varying your targets and clubs after each shot it is more of a reflection of what happens out on the course, and the more 'pressure' you can put on yourself at the range, the more you learn to deal with it when on the course

Your 1st tee results is a classic case of target-fixation by the sound of things - you are so focussed on the water along the left that you end up hitting the ball there, rather than picking a spot on the fairway as your target
 
And remember, the real reason you golf is to make fun of your friends' golf game.
 
You focusing on the bad that’s going to happen is a self-fulfilling prophecy. Thinking “I just want to avoid the creek” is actually concentrating on hitting the creek. Lay up with a wedge to the creek edge, then hit over. Eliminate the bad!

Golf is hard. If it wasn’t challenging you wouldn’t do it.
 
Do you struggle with stuff like that outside of golf? get all in your head, focus in negative outcomes, etc?

Look up and practice mindfulness.. and sometimes a little counseling can help (if you experience that outside of golf)..

And If you do lessons, see if they do on course lessons as well.

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ShortStickShaman said:
And remember, the real reason you golf is to make fun of your friends' golf game.
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I golf so that I can make fun of my own game and call myself a dummy about 50 times a round. Between that and seeing how many trees I can hit in a round (current PB is 15), it's fun enough.

Throw in the chance that I can invent new swear words and occasionally having my 13 year old turn in a better score than me and there is NOTHING I'd rather do. :)
 
I have found that negative thinking produces negative shots. Positive thinking works much better in producing good shots. We all shoot some bad shots but we need to put the bad shots behind us and not dwell upon them. Delete them from our heads. Move on to the next shot and tell yourself, "I know I can do this"
 
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