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Thread: The dad joke thread

  1. #76
    Major Champion TheDoctor's Avatar
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    What did the buffalo say when his son left?

    Bison!

    --------------------------------------------

    I was sitting in traffic the other day

    Probably why I got run over
    Bag - Tech Lock

    Driver - Great Big Bertha (Speeder 665 Evolution II TS)
    Fairways - RBZ 3 wood, 5 wood (Matrix Ozik X-con5)
    Irons - Z545 4-PW (Nippon NS Pro Modus3 Tour 130 Shafts)
    Wedges - RTX 2.0 48CB / 52 / 58 (Satin Black with Nippon Wedge Shafts)
    Putter - O-Works 1W
    Ball - Chrome Soft X

    He who hesitates is not only lost, but miles from the next exit

  2. #77
    Major Champion Phil75070's Avatar
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    I almost had a psychic girlfriend once but she broke up with me before we met.
    Proud Member of Team THP - 2018 Grandaddy with Callaway

    In my Alpha Convoy 514 Cart Bag:
    Driver: Epic Flash 10.5 (+1/D) w/ Project X EvenFlow Green Shaft 45g 5.5
    FWs: 5W (S/N) Epic Flash w/ Project X EvenFlow Green Shafts 45g 5.5
    Hybrid: X-Hot 4H
    Irons: Apex '19 5-AW w/ UST Mamiya Recoil 760 Shafts F2
    Wedges:
    52S/56C MD4 /60 PM 2.0 Grind - all w/UST Mamiya Recoil 460 Shafts F2
    Putter: Stroke Lab Three / Toulon Portland??
    Ball: Chrome Soft / ERC


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    tomcat (02-13-2019)

  4. #78
    Major Champion Reframmellator's Avatar
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    How many psychiatrists does it take to change a light bulb?

    Just one, but the light bulb really has to want to change.
    WITB:
    THP Long-Term Test: M4 Irons, 4-SW, Stock Stiff KBS Max 85 Shafts

    G400 Max Driver, 10.5/Mitsubishi Kuro Kage Silver Dual-Core TiNi 60 Stiff Shaft
    G400 3 Wood, 14.5/Alta CB 65 Stiff Shaft
    G30 5 Wood, 18/TFC 419F Stiff Shaft
    M4 Irons, 4-AW, Stock Stiff KBS Max 85 Shafts
    Glide Wedges, 54 WS/58 SS, Stock Shaft
    Giant M1t Putter, Golf Pride Tour SNSR Grip, 140 cc

  5. #79
    Junior Golfer
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    Did you know a shovel is a real "ground breaking" device?

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    tomcat (02-13-2019)

  7. #80
    Major Champion
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    How does NASA organize a party?

    They planet
    Spencer

    ------------------------------------------

    Driver: XR16 - The Attas
    FW: F7 3-4 FW -
    Pro 65 R
    Hybrids: BB 4 & 5 - Recoil 660 F3
    Irons: King F7 One 5-9 - Recoil 660 F3
    Wedges:
    RTX-4 / 48* 52* 56* - Recoil 110 F3
    Putter: EXO Indianapolis
    Bag: Cobra King stand bag


    2016 THP/UST Shaft Spectacular
    2017 Morgan Cup - Team Hackers
    2018 THP Sweep participant

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  9. #81
    No Dad bod..Father Figure J.B. Cobb III's Avatar
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    I bought a 3-D printer today. I told my dad that I could print a gun if I wanted too! He said, "That's no big deal! He's had a Canon printer for years!"

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  11. #82
    it seems so simple.. bajapalm's Avatar
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    What's green and red and goes around a 1,000 mph??

    A frog in a blender.

    What if you add ice cream??

    Frog Nog.

    dad!!!
    GBB Epic 10.5 60g Rogue Silver
    XR 16 - 3, 4 & 5 hybrids
    Apex Pro 5 - AW
    MackDaddy 56 & 60 PM grind
    FGP

    Chrome Soft
    3.0

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  13. #83
    Tour Pro radiman's Avatar
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    I still remember the last thing my Grandpa said to me before he kicked the bucket...

    He said, "hey, how far do you think I can kick this bucket?"
    Epic Flash Sub Zero 9* w/Aldila Rogue 130 White 60TX
    917F3 15* w/Tensei Pro Blue 70 TX
    X Forged UT 3 iron w/Motore Speeder TS 8.8 X
    Apex Pro (2016) 4-PW w/KBS Tour 130 X
    MD3 52, 56, 60
    Spider X Navy/White 35"
    Z-Star
    2018 Sync

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  15. #84
    Major Champion Bucketsofjoy's Avatar
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    Guy with no arms and no legs....

    Playing with a cat? Claude.

    Waterskiing? Skip

    In a tub? Dwayne.


    My legacy as a teacher is being able to take 45 minutes to tell a joke that ends with a lame pun. One day Ill document them.
    Bucketsofjoy
    WITB
    In my bag
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    Tour B XS

  16. #85
    Any better and I'd be you MagicSpell's Avatar
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    When I die I want to go peacefully in my sleep like my grandfather. Certainly not screaming wildly like the passengers in his car.
    Driver: G30 SF Tec
    Fairway: G400 3W
    Irons: Launcher HB 4-DW
    Wedges: Tour-S 56*/60*
    Putter: O-Works Versa Tank #7
    Ball: Chrome Soft / K-Sig Performance + / Gamer Tour

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  18. #86
    Mini Tour Player millsan1's Avatar
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    What si the difference between a hooker, a mistress and a wife?

    Hooker says "Are you done yet?"

    Mistress says "You're not done yet"

    Wife says "Beige. I think we should paint the ceiling beige."
    Always remember, the same country that invented golf and called it a game, invented bag pipes and called it music.

    WITB:

    Driver:
    XR 16 10.5, 45", Fujikura Vista Pro 55, R, Jumbo Pure

    Hybrids:
    Big Bertha 3H, Mamiya Recoil ES, 460, F3, R, Jumbo Pure
    Big Bertha 4H, Mamiya Recoil ES, 460, F3, R, Jumbo Pure
    Big Bertha 5H, Mamiya Recoil ES, 460, F3, R, Jumbo Pure
    Big Bertha 6H, Mamiya Recoil ES, 460, F3, R, Jumbo Pure
    Big Bertha 7H, Mamiya Recoil ES, 460, F3, R, Jumbo Pure


    Irons:
    Ping G30, 7I, Nippon NS Pro Zelos 7, R, Jumbo Pure
    Ping G30, 8I, Nippon NS Pro Zelos 7, R, Jumbo Pure
    Ping G30, 9I, Nippon NS Pro Zelos 7, R, Jumbo Pure

    Wedges:
    Ping G30, PW, Nippon NS Pro Zelos 7, R, Jumbo Pure
    Cleveland RTX3, 52, 2dot, True Temper Dynamic Gold, Jumbo Pure
    Cleveland RTX4, 56, 2dot, True Temper Dynamic Gold, Jumbo Pure
    Cleveland RTX3, 60, 2dot, True Temper Dynamic Gold, Jumbo Pure

    Putter:
    Odyssey, Red Ball, WinnPro 1.18 Grips

    Ball:
    Bridgestone E-12 Soft

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    bajapalm (02-14-2019), Clutch42 (02-14-2019)

  20. #87
    Club Pro KY Golfer's Avatar
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    How did the blonde die raking leaves? She fell out of the tree.

    Why did the blonde keep taking off the soda's bottle cap and putting it back on? The bottle cap said, "Sorry, try again."

    A guy walks into a bar, he sustained a mild concussion.
    TS3 9.5 - HZRDUS Smoke Black 60g S
    TS2 15 -HZRDUS Smoke Black 70g S
    816 H1 18 & 22 - Diamana 90g S
    JPX 900 Irons 5-PW - Dynamic Gold S300
    S18 Wedges 51 & 57 - Modus3 Tour 105X
    EVNROLL ER5B - FST Black Armour
    TBD at the 2019 Titleist Ultimate Metal Woods & Golf Ball Testing


  21. #88
    #TheCup
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    I told my girlfriend she drew her eyebrows too high. She seemed surprised.
    Proud member of #Team441 in #TheCup 2016! Thanks and !

    WITB
    Driver Great Big Bertha 11.5*
    Woods Great Big Bertha 3-wood 15*
    Hybrid 3 and 4 Apex
    Irons Apex CF 16 5-AW
    Wedges MD3 54*w/58*w
    Putter White Hot RX V-Line Fang
    Ball Chrome Soft Truvis yellow/black



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    millsan1 (02-14-2019), MWard (02-24-2019), pmm21 (03-04-2019), Wake (02-14-2019)

  23. #89
    Mini Tour Player millsan1's Avatar
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    A piece of string walks into a bar and asks for a beer. Bartender says "get out of here, we don't serve strings!"

    The string left, wnet outside and tied himself. He then loosened up the top end of himself.

    He walked back into the bar and asks for a beer. The bartender says "Aren't you that piece of string that was just in here?" and the string says "No, I'm a frayed knot!"
    Always remember, the same country that invented golf and called it a game, invented bag pipes and called it music.

    WITB:

    Driver:
    XR 16 10.5, 45", Fujikura Vista Pro 55, R, Jumbo Pure

    Hybrids:
    Big Bertha 3H, Mamiya Recoil ES, 460, F3, R, Jumbo Pure
    Big Bertha 4H, Mamiya Recoil ES, 460, F3, R, Jumbo Pure
    Big Bertha 5H, Mamiya Recoil ES, 460, F3, R, Jumbo Pure
    Big Bertha 6H, Mamiya Recoil ES, 460, F3, R, Jumbo Pure
    Big Bertha 7H, Mamiya Recoil ES, 460, F3, R, Jumbo Pure


    Irons:
    Ping G30, 7I, Nippon NS Pro Zelos 7, R, Jumbo Pure
    Ping G30, 8I, Nippon NS Pro Zelos 7, R, Jumbo Pure
    Ping G30, 9I, Nippon NS Pro Zelos 7, R, Jumbo Pure

    Wedges:
    Ping G30, PW, Nippon NS Pro Zelos 7, R, Jumbo Pure
    Cleveland RTX3, 52, 2dot, True Temper Dynamic Gold, Jumbo Pure
    Cleveland RTX4, 56, 2dot, True Temper Dynamic Gold, Jumbo Pure
    Cleveland RTX3, 60, 2dot, True Temper Dynamic Gold, Jumbo Pure

    Putter:
    Odyssey, Red Ball, WinnPro 1.18 Grips

    Ball:
    Bridgestone E-12 Soft

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  25. #90
    High on Helium Proto Bunker Snot's Avatar
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    What color is a burp?

    Burple!


    "It's not long, but it's not wrong" - Bubba Watson (Genesis Open)
    "If I was 'the man' I'd be in the fairway" - Bubba Watson (WGC Match Play)

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