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How do you learn to Love Golf Again?

fupresti

fupresti

Former Big Deal
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Some of you may know me, I haven't been the most active member in the last 18 months. Here is some backstory:

Golf consumed my life for many years. Back in December of 2017 I had gotten frustrated with my lack of progression. I considered myself a good golfer but I just seemed to come to some conclusion that I was as good realistically as I was going to be. I decided that I need to take a break from the game to hopefully get some perspective. January comes around and I found a new hobby that I embraced pretty quickly and suddenly I wasn't thinking about golf much. This goes by a couple of months and now my wife and I decide we want to buy a new home and that means out current home needs to be sale ready. I decide I am going to do all the work myself because I am cheap but motivated and suddenly all of my free time is spent painting walls, installing new floors and baseboards, refinishing cabinet etc. I figured once all of this work was done and we were moved in I would have free time again to golf.

Well, here I am 2 months in to my new home with plenty of free time and I just can't motivate myself to do much more then a work night out at Top Golf. Its been 19 months since my sabbatical and I have played 54 holes in that entire span. Work is good, life is good but for some reason I just can't will myself to so much as hit the range.

Any advice?
 
Come on back Fupresti. Best part about golf is, it’s always there when you need it. Plus, when in doubt? Shoot at the ball when it’s misbehaving.
 
The only advice I could give is do whatever makes you happy. We all go through different cycles in our life and they usually come back around to the things you love. I went through this last summer to a lesser degree when we closed on our house in May 2018. I had so many things to do and even when I had spare time, I would make an excuse to not golf.

Fast forward to this spring and I am loving golf again. Now off to my 1pm tee time...
 
I fell out of love with golf when we started having children. I was slow to take it back up because I didn't have anyone to play with. Once I got invited into a group, the love was rekindled and I am obsessed. So, I guess my advice is to make friends with some that play and remember that you are playing to have fun and not feed your family. I don't mind playing solo and meeting new people, but I have more fun and am more motivated to play well with my buddies. If you see me post in the Arizona local thread, don't hesitate to join us when there is an opening! I am on a mini break right now with a hand issue, but should be good to go around July 1.
 
That’s a tough one man.

I go through similar stints as well. Golf and fishing.

The only thing that really helps me get back into is go out and do it. Though that first or maybe 2nd time I’m not really out there golfing. I’m more looking around at the scenery. At the course architecture, trying to see what the design was meant to be or how to be played, trying to find some new way to play that hole. It makes it different for me. Keeps my interest into it I guess.

I stopped going to the range because of the reason you stated a little. It was no fun and burning me out. I’m about as good as I am ever going to be. That’s fine with me. Now I just make sure that when I do go out and play, it’s for me to enjoy life. Not to really hit a low score, although that’s obviously nice haha


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I was on a 6 month hiatus recently. To answer your question on how to love golf again: Coming back on THP forum and realizing how much friends I've made over the years here and I missed talking to them. My love of golf has slowly risen again. In fact, I'm golfing with 3 of them tomorrow. Overly excited to see how bad I am at golf again :act-up:
 
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After I got out of Marine Corps, I didn't play for almost 10 years. Took a bit to get back into it for me, I had other hobbies as well. Just play when you can or enjoy your new hobbies.
 
I did the same thing when my kids were born. Just didn't get to play much. I really enjoyed it when I did get to play, but I wasn't good and I knew there was not going to be time to get better at it so I just didn't mind. I would warm up as much as I could before my buddies trip every year, but that was just a weekend to get away and drink and act like a teenager with my buddies every year. Now that my kids do not require constant attention and I have time for it I love golf again. Now I am trying to improve and competing actively and my golf trip is more about the golf than anything. I guess the long and short of it is that you will either come back or you won't. It's your life and you get to pick what you do with your free time.
 
fupresti said:
Some of you may know me, I haven't been the most active member in the last 18 months. Here is some backstory:

Golf consumed my life for many years. Back in December of 2017 I had gotten frustrated with my lack of progression. I considered myself a good golfer but I just seemed to come to some conclusion that I was as good realistically as I was going to be. I decided that I need to take a break from the game to hopefully get some perspective. January comes around and I found a new hobby that I embraced pretty quickly and suddenly I wasn't thinking about golf much. This goes by a couple of months and now my wife and I decide we want to buy a new home and that means out current home needs to be sale ready. I decide I am going to do all the work myself because I am cheap but motivated and suddenly all of my free time is spent painting walls, installing new floors and baseboards, refinishing cabinet etc. I figured once all of this work was done and we were moved in I would have free time again to golf.

Well, here I am 2 months in to my new home with plenty of free time and I just can't motivate myself to do much more then a work night out at Top Golf. Its been 19 months since my sabbatical and I have played 54 holes in that entire span. Work is good, life is good but for some reason I just can't will myself to so much as hit the range.

Any advice?
Click to expand...

Golf with THPers. Bet that'll work.
 
#1 it’s great to see you back on the boards.

#2 keep sitting on the sidelines. watch golf. stay engaged here. eventually it will come back. at least it has for me when i went through similar indifference.


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Do what makes you happy man.

When I'm frustrated with my game, I book a round with at least a couple of close friends and play for fun, have a beverage (if you're into that; I've been known to have a couple) and enjoy the company. Remind myself why I started playing the game. While I've gotten into improvement and even league play, golf for me will always be about the time I get to spend on the course with friends away from any stress life is currently throwing at me.
 
I feel for you. But, if you aren't enjoying golf, I don't think it's something you can force. Maybe baby steps. Try joining a league or something that gets you like 9 holes a week and start from there? The range can be boring for people that play golf all the time. Having an outing that is pre-scheduled and people that are expecting you to be there may be just the motivation you need to kick start the game again. It may take a little while for the fire to start burning again.

Either way, I wish you luck. If it's golfing or any other en devour you choose to explore in its place.

Edit: I forgot to ask this.

Is there something particular about the game of golf that stops you from getting in the car and driving to the course? What is it about the game that you just flat out do not like? You say you grew frustrated with your lack of progression, is it the fear of having to scrap back to get to the point you were? Also, I am not trying to be a downer. So, forgive me if I am bringing up negatives. I just know you have been a member here for a long time and you used to really enjoy the game. I hate to see someone fall out of love with the game.
 
I went through an 8 year hiatus after I got out of the Marines and then another 5 years in my 30’s. Fell back into love with the game at 38...don’t know why I came back, but I did. Now I am immersed in the game and “lifestyle “. I think you just have to let it come back to you when it is time.
 
I think eventually the itch just comes back to golf again.

Sort of in the same boat, only my situation was have a kid, move, work on house, Canadian winter. I was burnt out, and was happy for a break from golf.

Went out for the first round of the year, with someone I hadn't played with before..... shot a decent score by fluke, and suddenly I really want to be out there.

The part I struggle with is that I am really just not into gear anymore. I don't buy new release, and am generally ok with my older stuff. I should be amped up for new releases, but they come and go and don't really pique my interest unfortunately.
 
fupresti said:
Some of you may know me, I haven't been the most active member in the last 18 months. Here is some backstory:

Golf consumed my life for many years. Back in December of 2017 I had gotten frustrated with my lack of progression. I considered myself a good golfer but I just seemed to come to some conclusion that I was as good realistically as I was going to be. I decided that I need to take a break from the game to hopefully get some perspective. January comes around and I found a new hobby that I embraced pretty quickly and suddenly I wasn't thinking about golf much. This goes by a couple of months and now my wife and I decide we want to buy a new home and that means out current home needs to be sale ready. I decide I am going to do all the work myself because I am cheap but motivated and suddenly all of my free time is spent painting walls, installing new floors and baseboards, refinishing cabinet etc. I figured once all of this work was done and we were moved in I would have free time again to golf.

Well, here I am 2 months in to my new home with plenty of free time and I just can't motivate myself to do much more then a work night out at Top Golf. Its been 19 months since my sabbatical and I have played 54 holes in that entire span. Work is good, life is good but for some reason I just can't will myself to so much as hit the range.

Any advice?
Click to expand...

Don't make me come to Arizona.
 
Fup - good to see you here again man. I went through a stretch like this after I graduated from law school. I was living in places where I didn't really have anyone to play with and played poorly when I did get out, so I became completely indifferent to whether I actually went to the course. What made the difference for me was just getting back out again doing it. But it took a little while. The kick-start was moving back to my hometown and being able to play with my dad, but it wasn't like just having someone to play with made me want to do it overnight. I was still frustrated and ambivalent for awhile, but as I played, the desire to do so more and more often came back.

So my best suggestion - book a time at a course you enjoy and see how it goes. Maybe you'll surprise yourself and want to do it again sooner than you think.
 
Having played 1 round of Golf with you and working the PGA Show with you...

You have one of the sweetest golf swings I've ever seen. Very envious. Fluid/rotation/ and just let the club swing.

That alone would get me to play multiple times a week. I see your point of not seeing enough progression but when you're a 3 or 4 handicap I can't quite comprehend the need to improve on that.
 
go to a stay'n'play? You'd get relaxation and some golf if you want.

Play for money? Or something else.

Myself I enjoy the round much more if I'm with the right playing partners. So play with THPers, competitive people, or people who are just out for fun? Whichever suits you man.

Hope you get back to enjoying the game, as I've seen you shoot, and I'm jealous.
 
Life has its ups and downs. I was very active athletically in my 20's. Then marriage and children and work took up all my time. I gave up all sports except the once a year corporate golf outing. 30 years later, I'm playing golf 3 times a week and with little skill, but it's a joy to get out and play, because I can.
Now you can take a hiatus for a while, but it's up to you to see if you enjoy the game. If you do, get out there when you can, for the joy of it, whether or not you play well. I play with a bunch of guys, some in their 70's and 80's shooting their age regularly. Sometimes it never grows old.
 
You get back into it by playing. Want to play tomorrow morning at Golf Club of Estrella? 7:40am tee? We need a fourth.
 
It sounds like right now, golf just isnt a priority for you. Thats cool. Maybe youll come back to it one day, maybe you wont. In the meantime, working on your house certainly isnt time wasted.
 
Make it casual. Grab a few buddy's, have a few beers and enjoy. Maybe play a scramble so no one shot counts.
 
fupresti said:
Some of you may know me, I haven't been the most active member in the last 18 months. Here is some backstory:

Golf consumed my life for many years. Back in December of 2017 I had gotten frustrated with my lack of progression. I considered myself a good golfer but I just seemed to come to some conclusion that I was as good realistically as I was going to be. I decided that I need to take a break from the game to hopefully get some perspective. January comes around and I found a new hobby that I embraced pretty quickly and suddenly I wasn't thinking about golf much. This goes by a couple of months and now my wife and I decide we want to buy a new home and that means out current home needs to be sale ready. I decide I am going to do all the work myself because I am cheap but motivated and suddenly all of my free time is spent painting walls, installing new floors and baseboards, refinishing cabinet etc. I figured once all of this work was done and we were moved in I would have free time again to golf.

Well, here I am 2 months in to my new home with plenty of free time and I just can't motivate myself to do much more then a work night out at Top Golf. Its been 19 months since my sabbatical and I have played 54 holes in that entire span. Work is good, life is good but for some reason I just can't will myself to so much as hit the range.

Any advice?
Click to expand...

If golf is no longer your cup of tea, there is nothing wrong with that. No need to force yourself to engage in an activity that no longer appeals to you.
 
I’m with you and it happened to me with another hobby. If life is good and you are happy (which makes me quite happy I might add), then life is a garden. Dig it.

And I bet if you do come back you will still beat the ever-loving pants off most folk, including me.
 
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