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Are we too hard on our own Golf Game?

wubears71

wubears71

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Albatross 2024 Club
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Do we hold ourselves to too high a standard in regards to golfers? So many of us on here are high single and mid handicap golfers and yet just about everyone of us thinks we suck. Okay, compared to pros and elite college golfers, yes we suck, but compared to the everyday golfer, we are a pretty darn good bunch of golfers. I play a lot of golf as a single and I would comfortably say I'm a better player than 3/4 if not more of the people I get paired up with. The scorecard may not reflect it at the end of the round in the sense that I shot an 86 and the other guy shot an 83 on the card with several mulligans.

I'm just trying to look at things more positively. While we all can certainly improve, we as a group are pretty freaking good relative to other golfers.

Thoughts?
 
Absolutely. 110% no doubt. Will that stop me from being hard on myself? Absolutely 1,000% not. :bulgy-eyes:

It's a vicious cycle.

Although, I will say, I have gotten MUCH MUCH better than I used to be. But still...
 
I would agree with this. A coworker of mine and I were talking about golfing. He plays maybe once a month, and told me he chipped in for a 32 over par, best he has shot this year. He asked me how I played and I told him I lipped out a put for a 79 and he looked at me like I was crazy. He couldn't believe that I had shot that score.

I also think many of us go home and only focus on the bad shots we hit, and don't give ourselves much credit for the good shots we hit.

Case in point, I can't stop thinking about that 6-7' putt that didn't drop on 18, but until this thread I didn't think about the 12' putt I made for par on 15, or the 10' putt I made on 9, etc etc.
 
I'll say yes and no.

Yes we all suck compared to those that are at the top of the game. Nobody likes the 7 handicap who acts like he's some sort of boss because he barely breaks 80 regularly from 6000 yards and wins the odd Net Tournament.

No, we don't suck according to our abilities or as a percentage against every golfer on earth. The handicap system literally puts a number on your skill level and potential and says "here you are".

Everyone needs to decide for themselves where the line is where bad golf ends and good golf begins. Is it at scratch? Single digits? 15 cap? 20 cap? Is cap irrelevant and it's all about consistency? Sexiness of swing?

For me personally I've decided that great golf is when you can enter and legitimately compete in Gross Tournaments. By that standard I Suck.
 
Sometimes when my expectations get out of whack the thing that helps me is to look at tour pro stats.

Don't get me wrong, those guys are amazing but when it comes to make % or proximity to the hole across the whole tour it helps put things in perspective.

For example, Rafa Cabrera Bello is currently leading the tour in % made from 5-10' after a GIR at 67%. How many of us think we should make 3/4? There are some REALLY good players on tour that are only converting on 44% of these (ie: Justin Rose). http://www.pgatour.com/stats/stat.384.html

Another example, on approaches from the fairway from 125-150 yards Rory Sabbatini leads the tour with an average of just over 20'. Rory McIlroy is at 31'. http://www.pgatour.com/stats/stat.339.html

Given how little I practice compared to those guys, it's kind of a miracle I can carry a 6 handicap at all.
 
I think it's an exponential thing and also follows the laws of diminished returns.

I suck. Just started keeping score. I'm not hard on myself because I know that I am just really beginning my journey. I also appreciate just being out there with my kids and friends. I have committed to improving and that's where I think the exponential thing comes in. The more I strive to improve, the more exponentially I will become harder on myself. It's inevitable. I'm already seeing this in my practice sessions at the range. "Why can't I hit the ball like this on the course!!" I won't say I expect this of myself, yet, but I'm sure the time will come the more I play.

Then you reach a point where you have to put in TONS more time to improve just a that little bit more and you hit the diminished returns situation.

When you invest time and energy into something, you want and expect a certain outcome. If you don't get that, you start beating up on yourself if you care about achieving that outcome. It's human nature I think.
 
Absolutely, I'm way too hard on myself and I think the better I get the harder I am on myself. Sometimes it really does help me to go out and just play a few practice rounds, not keep score, and just focus on the good shots. It's kind of a decompression from trying to score well where you can get caught up in the bad shots.

It's easy to get caught up with the bad shot during solo rounds for me also. Then it's all about you, you're hitting every shot and you're not seeing anyone else hitting terrible shots to compare your game to. That's why most of my solo rounds I play several balls and just have fun.
 
In general, yes, I am too hard on myself and my golf game, especially recently. Golfers are notorious for having stupidly short memories on one hand, and idiotically long memories on the other. So when you hit that handful of really quality shots during a round, or you put up a score that is much better than typical, we tend to assign that as our preferred "norm". Now, with the preferred "norm", it's pretty hard to get to that level with any sort of consistency, if we get there at all. I shot even par only a few weeks ago. Even though I'm still smack in the middle of a swing overhaul, I have been grinding about not being at or under 80 since then. That's just unrealistic on my part (and bordering on dumb), yet I'm aspiring to that preferrered, much lower, "norm" score.
 
Given where I am with just starting to play again...I am probably way too hard my game. But I know I should be hitting the ball a little better and I know where I used to be when I played a lot...so there is some frustration there. I just keep telling myself I'll get back there eventually.
 
Yes and no for me. Obviously I get frustrated when I have a bad round because I know how I can play but I also know I'm not going to be going out and breaking course records any time soon. I haven't gotten to play as much as I would like recently so I'm trying to taper my expectations and just enjoy it when I can.
 
Yes. I think so.

But I think with everything else in life it is about setting expectations. Real expectations that is. I started this year in the high 90's or low 100's and my goal was to become consistent hitting in the mid-to-high 90's. Once I did that, I 'adapted' my goal to hitting consistently in the low-to-mid 90's and maybe breaking 90. I have broken 90 twice this year but am still trying to work on more consistency with the low-90 scores.

However, summer is almost over and my golf playing will go down from the 3+ times a week to about once a week starting mid-october when the weather in Western WA starts to go to crap. Will need a reset at the end of the year and set 'new' goals starting next summer.
 
Yeah, we the weekend hackers and those who play to get better have high standards of ourselves. At the same time, I remind myself the quote from Minor Leagues' all time great catcher Crash Davis, "FUN, Goddammit!"
 
I know I'm too hard on myself...to the point of my mental weakness during a round can sometimes cripple the physical part of the game. It frustrates me as this used to be a strength...I find myself comparing myself to late teens / early 20's Shred who was a low single digit vs. post-extended hiatus / fat and inflexible Shred who is a mid-capper. Getting frustrated with scores that aren't up to my own standard, not executing shots 100% when in fact, NO ONE DOES THAT YOU MORON!

I will always beat myself up and try to be better...I'm still chasing that younger version of me that had tons of free time to play and practice and low scores came easy to. I'll likely never get there but I'm sure I'll still beating myself up.
 
Most people do not want to be within 20' of me if something goes wrong. I'm very hard on myself to the point of exhaustion. I want to be better but when things don't go right, I go left. I will say I'm a better golfer now than I was when I was 20, 30 even 40. I'll never be a scratch golfer, but I want to be like my hero mikedean441. Now that's a goal in life.
 
Sometimes. I've shot 40 for 9 5 times this year but my average score for other opposite 9 is 48. I can string some good 9's together but bottom line is I'm a 47 year old hack who's ambition far outweighs my talent. It is what it is. I just like having a good time with friends and realize my best golf is in the rear view mirror.
 
To me, those that are hard on themselves are the ones that get better. Having an honest game and reflecting honestly with yourself helps you get better.

I have a couple buddies who always blame their poor play on other conditions besides themselves, or don't score themselves properly in practice rounds to make themselves look better.

Having an honest golf game and holding yourself accountable is the only way to get better.
 
m3golfjackson said:
To me, those that are hard on themselves are the ones that get better. Having an honest game and reflecting honestly with yourself helps you get better.

I have a couple buddies who always blame their poor play on other conditions besides themselves, or don't score themselves properly in practice rounds to make themselves look better.

Having an honest golf game and holding yourself accountable is the only way to get better.
Click to expand...

That is one thing I will say I do....I always score the game what it is...I hit a terrible shot, I go play it from there.

I want my score to be an honest reflection of how I played, so I can see what I did right or wrong, where I had some bad (or good) luck on a hole, and so on.

That lets me know what my focus will be on the range. Had a terrible day from the tee? Let's work on that. Terrible with a certain club or two, let's hit those. It has been paying off for me on the green, as I usually end each range session on a practice green with something like 50 chips or short pitch shots and anywhere from 50 to 100 putts. That part of the game generally keeps my scores from becoming too ridiculous....
 
We all hold ourselves to a higher standard because we can't understand why we don't constantly shoot our personal best. I mean we did it once, nothing much has changed in my golfing life since then, so why can't I always shoot lower numbers.

Honestly, I stopped beating myself up over score. I play once or twice a week, I rarely practice, I take what I get at the end of the round and punch the numbers into the software. Then look forward to the next round and hope it all clicks.



Sent from my 6045O using Tapatalk
 
I used to be way too hard on myself. The past couple of years that has changed somewhat. I still get upset if my game is in the dump but for the most part I have a realistic view of the state of my game. Being a father with a busy job and other hobbies means that I'm not going to get as much time to dedicate to the game and I'm probably not going to be getting a ton better than I already am. I'll still do everything I can to win events or money from my buddies but at the end of the day if I don't play great, I'm ok with it.
 
Great thread, I played Sunday and Monday and did not do well compared to the last 4-5 rounds and was quite pissed off at myself. Then on 18 yesterday I just had to laugh at myself when it occurred to me that I am 58 years old bad back and bad knees, why am I pissed off for being outside with friends playing a game?

Sure I want to shoot in the 70's every round and maybe break par someday, but the reality is Golf is hard and it will come and go as it feels like it. You young guys can put in the work and get better, us older folks (at least most of us) have to use what we have and enjoy what time we have left at any level.
 
I know the shots I am capable of hitting and if it is less than that then I am not thrilled. Even worse is when I hit a shot without my PSR or that I am not 100% committed on I get much more annoyed since there is no excuse for that. Thinking, wait how far am I trying to hit this ball, in the middle of my downswing never ends well.If I have 180 into a par 5 in 2 and don't make birdie I am upset with myself. If I don't get on the green from 250 that doesn't affect me.
 
I'm hard on myself when I make dumb decisions or not execute an easy shot. Multiple times yesterday my playing partner told me to hit my most comfortable iron that is 150-160. Instead on one occasion I flushed my hybrid dead straight into ankle high rough. Sure I left myself 70 yards to the pin, but I don't know how to hit out of this garbage. If I hit my 7 or 6iron I'd be anywhere from 100-120 out, what's wrong with hitting a PW or 9iron from the fairway? Nothing, and furthermore instead of having a chance to save par or bogey I carded a triple.

Other occasion I had another opportunity to leave myself a scoring iron or wedge into the green. I once again hit a good hybrid dead straight into a fairway bunker. Same exact scenario. I don't know how to hit out of fairway bunkers and couldn't even see the green. Walked off with a double 7 instead of a par or bogey.

I'm hard on myself when I just try and get as close to the green as possible instead of "playing to a number" or having an 8iron or lower into a green, it doesn't always have to be my shortest wedge.
 
I just had a really good conversation about this with a friend yesterday.

At some point we need to take ownership of what we're readily capable of. If we aren't improving, and we aren't really doing anything to improve it, it's probably time to accept and enjoy the game we play.
 
ToohipGottaGo said:
Most people do not want to be within 20' of me if something goes wrong. I'm very hard on myself to the point of exhaustion. I want to be better but when things don't go right, I go left. I will say I'm a better golfer now than I was when I was 20, 30 even 40. I'll never be a scratch golfer, but I want to be like my hero mikedean441. Now that's a goal in life.
Click to expand...

Im severely over-rated, you will see first hand in a few days.
 
Yes...and really shouldn't be. The more I realize this the more fun it is. I don't get paid to golf so it really is imbarrasing when I let frustration show. I'm reminded every time I play with Tera how fun it can be if I just let it go. Just too competitive with myself I guess and think I'm still in my prime.. Haha
 
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