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What would you have done?

baldguy

baldguy

Part-Time Sasquatch
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I was on the range earlier this week next to a guy who was struggling pretty hard. He was shanking nearly all of his shots really badly but he had a look of determination and I admired that. Even if he kept spraying me with dirt :D

Now, it hasn't been that long since I *was* this guy. With the help of THP, tons of research and more tons of practice, a few lessons and even the Panda himself I'm miles ahead of where I was just a few short months ago. That said, I'm still the furthest thing from a pro and while I'm proud of my progress I would normally never think to try and tell someone else (other than perhaps my wife or my dad) what they should be doing. I really, really wanted to help him though since I could very easily relate to his struggles. I thought to myself that he was doing a lot of the exact things that I've worked so hard to fix... and maybe, just maybe I could share some of the "ah ha!" moments I've had and ease his pain just a little... but then I thought that a few months ago I would have absolutely hated it if someone I didn't know had approached me on the range to offer tips. It's really not in my nature to do so anyway.

Every bone in my body wanted to give him some words of encouragement or show him some things I'd learned or at least invite him for a round... but I really didn't want to be "that guy" so I just said nothing. At one point while I was hitting driver I stepped forward a few feet to grab my tee and he whizzed a low one 45 degrees left (he was to my right) and nearly hit me. He quickly apologized and I said "no problem, man" but didn't continue the conversation in an effort to stifle my desire to give those unwanted and unsolicited tips. In retrospect I wish I had at least introduced myself and thrown out the invite. I didn't recognize him so there's a good chance he is a new member at my club... Now I feel like I came off as a snob or a jerk for not talking to him at all. Maybe I was better off avoiding the situation since I'm not sure at what point I would have caved and thrown out a tip or two. I've never really had the desire to do that before so I was in uncharted territory.

So, what would you have done? I know most of us (rightly) wouldn't have given advice to a stranger. But, would you have done *something* to try and help the guy out?
 
It's a tough spot...honestly I don't know...let's hope you meet him again, and then it's easier to strike a conversation and help him out.
 
Thats the THP in you wanting to reach out and help. Truly loving this sport you want everyone to do well, or at least when you're not playing them...lol. I have actually done this many times on the range with mixed results. Some being rude and offputting right away(which I totally respected, and expect each time). But for all the ones that didnt want any pointers, the few that I ended up spending hours with on the range were well worth it. I found that relating seeing something similar wrong in swings is a great way to relate to the issue and is easier to work from there.

PS....when working on issues in your own game it seems like you can see these in most every golfers swing...I find myself still doing this
 
If it was me, I would've said something like "hey man, y'know, I see you working on some things I had to work on recently too. I'm happy to share with you what helped me, if it's OK with you". But honestly, I would've done the same thing you did, just stayed quiet and let him try and dig it out of the dirt.
 
I wouldn't have said anything. If he opened the door and asked for it I would try and help out if I could, but I wouldn't offer it up to a stranger.
 
I don't say any thing unless someone ask. The other day I was on the range and someone ask me about a driver question. I was happy to give him some advice that I thought would help. He thanked me several times and I told him anytime I might could help that I would.
 
Man that's a terrible situation, on one hand I'd really want to offer some help and on the other I know those days were the most heartbreaking days in my golfing life but they forced me to get a few lessons and seek help. I would have probably said nothing and remembered when it was me, instant humility.
 
I wouldn't have said anything about his swing.

BUT:

I would (and have) written down the address to the forum and told them about the site, and that there is free instruction given to people who post their videos. And that if they don't want it out there for the world to see, you can PM the person (aka tadashi70 now), who at the time was the screen name GolfTec. I would say it in about 30 seconds, and was more to get them here, and as an aside, about the swing help.
 
I tell you what....having had several lessons and know what I need to work on......it really pisses me off when a Korean who speaks next to 0 English tries to give me advise on the range. I am like STFU and work on your own weekass swing.
 
I don't pay attention to other people on the range, unless it's the college golf team because you can hear their golf balls whizzing by. I wouldn't ever consider trying to give somebody advice, even if they did ask.
 
66Tiger said:
I tell you what....having had several lessons and know what I need to work on......it really pisses me off when a Korean who speaks next to 0 English tries to give me advise on the range. I am like STFU and work on your own weekass swing.
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Boy-That-Escalated-Quickly-Anchorman.gif
 
When I'm in that spot, last thing I want is someone else on the range giving me advise so I wouldn't be that guy. If we made eye contact I might just say 'keep at it, It'll come' or something of that nature.
 
Maybe we should all get little business cards that say nothing but "thehackersparadise.com" to hand out in these situations
 
If I want advise on my swing, the only place it's coming from is a pro who's watching me hit balls. I'd be pretty offended if some random guy at the range started offering me advice to be honest. For that reason, I wouldn't dare to start offering advise myself.
 
Eh. Tough spot. He could be a decent player that's just rusty or having a bad day striking the ball. He could just be having a bad day all together and just taking out some frustration. I wouldn't initiate conversation with a "tip", because if it doesn't work for him, he may think your a kook and never talk to you again. Maybe just strike up some small talk and see where it goes from there. I guess if he doesn't talk back from small talk, you'll know not to throw out a tip. If he's struggling, his guard is already up. Maybe he will loosen up by taking a few seconds to say where he is from and where he might play golf normally and then be more receptive to a tip.
 
Hawk said:
I don't pay attention to other people on the range, unless it's the college golf team because you can hear their golf balls whizzing by. I wouldn't ever consider trying to give somebody advice, even if they did ask.
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I'm the same. Honestly the only place I will help someone is on the putting green if they ask. Other than that, my focus is on me.
 
I wouldn't offer unless we got into a conversation and he asked for the help. Now if it was a nice looking woman, I'd jump right in, lol.
 
tander said:
I don't say any thing unless someone ask. The other day I was on the range and someone ask me about a driver question. I was happy to give him some advice that I thought would help. He thanked me several times and I told him anytime I might could help that I would.
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I offer help when it's asked of me. Otherwise I don't say a word. The guy is already upset enough and I wouldn't want to compound that by giving advice that he doesn't want
 
adamw238 said:
I offer help when it's asked of me. Otherwise I don't say a word. The guy is already upset enough and I wouldn't want to compound that by giving advice that he doesn't want
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He will give advice to your golf clubs free off charge..Adam my sand wedge wants your number..

Im in aggreance thay I woildnt have initiated a conversation. However, when the ball came close and a conversation started I would have started jabbering. Advice im not sure of untill the conversation started but thanks to thp I have a few "would you like to try" clubs and went from there.
 
I wouldn't have done or said anything. Even if someone asked I wouldn't, I just don't know enough to help or be a reputable source of info.
 
I agree with the other posters. You did the right thing. I never give unsolicited advice. Even when asked, I don't have the knowledge to really help someone with their swing.
 
Tough spot, but one that can be handled gracefully. In this situation I would just introduce myself and make a mundane comment about the weather or range, just to break the ice. If the person wishes to talk, you have a chance to perhaps help them out. In the past I usually stay away from specific advice but will share some resources that have helped me (THP, Shawn Clement on YouTube, a couple books), and generally just be positive to their efforts. This game is hard and if a stranger will go out of their way to tell you that it will get better and here's a few things to seek out, that is uplifting.
 
Tough spot & trying to help is a double edge sword.

I probably would have introduced myself and made small talk about anything but his swing. You never know if the casual conversation might have settled him down.

If during the talk you got the vibe he was ok and not the kind of person who would take advice wrong, then ask "what are you working on" & talk about how you are getting better & maybe he could get more comfortable.
 
I would have left him alone. I've been that guy too and one guy tried to give me advice that I found very weird. I said thank you, but then I felt obligated to sit there and try his advice. Everyone in that situation has different ways of dealing with it and will seek help their own way as well.
 
What would you have done?

When he whizzed the ball past me i might have said something like "No problem. Hey, it's a hard game." That would give him a little opening to talk or ask for help. If he didn't take it I'd leave him alone.


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