I've perfected the consumption of the oreo... You're first mistake are those oreo's are not double stuff... Huge mistake! The proper fat-kid approved method for eating Oreo's is to take a bite out of the oreo, of approximately 1/3rd of the cookie, you will then bite down on that 1/3rd, splitting it into two small pieces. With one piece firmly squirrel'd away in each cheek, take a large sip of milk. Now we close the mouth, and chew the cookie while maintaining some milk in the mouth for softening of the cookie.