- Moderator
- #676
This exact thing happened to me this last season. Not an entire team of parents, it was only just one complaining during an indoor tournament before the actual season even started (and we won the freaking tournament). It entirely changed my outlook and passion for doing it for a solid month and a half.Okay guys, I need some help.
After winning @70% of our games as a 2nd year 14a team we were just horrible at our 1st weekend of 16a. All of these families have been with me for at least 1 year, several for multiple years. ZERO complaints. Then after this weekend... some parents met to talk in the parking lot at practice. That led to a secret parent meeting. That led to 2+ pages of typed up "feedback" (read: complaints and commentary about how to coach).
I'm working through the emotions of it. For example, one of the comments basically said they didn't respect me. That stings. And I wonder why, if they don't respect me, are they even on the team. We played another weekend tourney and I found myself in my head, second guessing myself, making decisions differently, reacting to things parents said. It isn't / wasn't fun. I'm a volunteer. If it isn't fun and some number of families don't appreciate, like or respect me, what's the point?
How do I get past this?
PT of Order - winning 70% of games is irrelevant to me. It is about a lot more than Ws/Ls in my book. But it is context ... we went from being the 2022 Atlanta Braves to the Bad News Bears, and things got ugly thereafter.
Like I said, it was only one parent. I can't imagine how I'd feel if more than that had done it. But it came down to why I was still doing it. It wasn't for the parents (especially that specific one) it was for the kids. And it was very obvious when the parent's feelings are not the kids feelings. So you know better than anyone, if the kids are still on your side, f**k the parents. A small percentage of them ruin wayyyyyyy to many things in sports for a ton of people.
Also I did have more parents issues with some previous years that were no longer on the team,. but I straight up offered them if they thought they could do a better job to come on down and do it. Shut them up pretty quick
I was VERY lucky for the five years I coached. Four total parents complained. Three of them were gone the next season. I had a great relationship with 95% of the parents and if I didn't, I would have quit wayyyyy sooner. I would ask yourself if the relationship with the kids trumps how the parents are affecting you