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Why did I become a teacher?

What a crap situation. My wife has had a few parents show up to have words with her after their little angel got in trouble and lied about it, but nothing to that degree.

Hopefully you've already talked to your building's union rep, they should have one with you from here on out when it comes to that parent. And your administration is TERRIBLE for allowing a parent to just confront you like that. Terrible. I've got 5 active teachers and 2 retired ones in my family, so I've heard a lot (and unfortunately been through a few with my wife) and for that situation to happen... man. I'm boiling just thinking about what happened to you.
 
As a teacher myself I know the feeling. I teach elementary school and I've had kids go home and lie about something that happened in class and the parent believes every word. Fortunately my administration never allows angry parents to speak to teachers and this is where I think your admins dropped the ball. There's no way a parent should have been allowed by themselves down to your class. In my school, if a parent comes in school safety always contacts an admin who comes and gets them and escorts them to the office where they will then call in the teacher to have a discussion. You handled it very well though and I hope it all works out in the end.
 
I think you handled it well.
Were you told EXACTLY what the allegations were?
I put my hands on him several times could mean a lot of different things.
 
You handled it in the right way! Document EVERYTHING and contact you union rep ASAP, just to cya. Sorry you have to go through this, your admin really dropped the ball.


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I would contact your lawyer and explain what happened. These are serious allegations and could be a great deal of trouble for you. I'm sorry this is an issue for you. The restraint you showed is pretty cool. I don't like being yelled at especially in the face.
 
Wake said:
It is a sad state the schools are in these days.
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This.

First, call your union rep, pronto. Never deal with management in a potential disciplinary situation without a rep present. Two, press charges. You are a teacher, there is no reason to deal with a-holes like that. Your school put you in harms way and the guy threatened you. Him touching you is battery, period. There is no other way a guy like that learns. Either that or busting his jaw.

Good luck
 
Unfortunately you don't need a license to become a parent. I honestly don't know how teachers do it today in our litigious society. I really admire teachers for their patience with all the ill behaved kids and lousy parents.
 
That is horrible man such a miserable experience I am sure. You handled it correctly and if nothing else you provided a model to your students about to handle a situation like that.

Good luck moving forward and I hope it gets resolved quickly. Reach out if you need anything
 
Wake said:
It is a sad state the schools are in these days.
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I agree. In most cases it is the parents that needs the **** slapped out of em.
 
gizmo3putt said:
Tell HR & your union rep that if you even get a blemish or admin leave etc.. that your going to go with filing charges & sue the school for allowing an unescorted parent to roam the school freely.
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i second this. You sound like you handled the situation well and unfortunately to many parents and students who lack the respect to take responsibility for their actions or actions of their kids.
 
emart2173 said:
i second this. You sound like you handled the situation well and unfortunately to many parents and students who lack the respect to take responsibility for their actions or actions of their kids.
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It is shocking how much of this goes on. Accountability and responsibility need to be taught to a lot of people.
 
The only thing I would say in rebuttal to the people advising you to press charges is that it will very likely incite the A-Hole dad to press charges against you with the alleged touching of his son. It might be wise to be 100% certain you could prove your own innocence before pressing charges.
 
Why did I become a teacher?

It's unacceptable that the parent was allowed to "meet with you" with no Administration present. Sounds like your Principal and APs are chicken-s--t.

When I was coaching HS hoops, a kid on an opposing team LITERALLY tackled one of my players into our bench. I went down to pick-up our player and then let the opposing player know that his actions were unacceptable. I was two feet away from the tackler the whole time. Our parents were behind our bench to witness the whole thing.
The next day I get a visit from my AD who said the opposing player's Dad and school called and said I put my hands on the kid. 10 parents immediately called their school and called BS for me. That ended that, but, goes to show a kid can say ANYTHING in a USA public school and "it must be true". I got out 8 years ago after working for three consecutive HORRIBLE Principals.
 
TheCrest4 said:
It is shocking how much of this goes on. Accountability and responsibility need to be taught to a lot of people.
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Society is going in the opposite direction and pushing more of the victim mentality and that everything is somebody else's fault. The more we lose the family structure and personal responsibility the further away from the way we get from how many of us were brought up. If there was any note that came home from the school it was my fault and I was dealt with by my parents. I never would have thought to lie about a teacher for the fear of retribution once I got caught.

My aunt and uncle retired a couple years earlier than planned because of how school system was heading down the wrong path.
 
Barberakb said:
I think you handled it well.
Were you told EXACTLY what the allegations were?
I put my hands on him several times could mean a lot of different things.
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No I was going to ask the dad what exactly I did but never got the chance
 
Thanks for the advice guys. I called a good friend who is also our lawyer and told him what happen. I then documented everything that has happen with this student and the parent. He told me to record everything during the meeting on my phone and if at any time I feel uncomfortable inform them that I will no longer talk without my lawyer there. He also told me I had the right to still press charges and could sue the school for an unsafe work area. I told him that I really just don't want to work at this school anymore and go back to my old school. He told me to tell HR I do not feel safe working there anymore and they will have to move to another school next year. He also said if I really want to push the issue then tell them I don't feel safe coming to work anymore because he could come back and try to hurt me. They then would have to either move me now which would not happen with only 20 some days of school left. He said they most likely would have to get a long term sub and I would either work downtown for the last couple weeks or get paid and start my summer break early.
 
Sorry to hear that man. Protect yourself and press charges.

Thanks to all the teachers out there.
 
I am really sorry this happened to you, my GF works in a middle school in South Houston and they get hostile parents all the time. That parent should have never been allowed to roam the school on his own that is a serious security issue, what if he had been armed??

Document everything, I don't care how small it is, it could be beneficial later.

I hope everything works out for you.
 
I wouldn't press charges but that's just me.
I mean, what would the charges be? Did he hit you or threaten your life? Do you have any viable evidence?

I would forget that and move on, but again, just my opinion.
 
I'm a middle school Principal, and am very disappointed in the way your administration handled this situation.

1. Parents should NEVER have access to areas of the building where classes are held. The fact that that parent was allowed to be in the gym waiting for you is gross negligence.
2. Any parent meeting regarding a contentious issue such as this one should occur with the administration present as your advocate. The child should absolutely not be present.
3. You have rights and you have a union lawyer. Parents often forget that part. When I have a parent threaten me/my staff/the district with their lawyer, I am comforted by the fact that I too have an attorney. Legal representation is part of your union dues.

Hope this helps.
 
Barberakb said:
I wouldn't press charges but that's just me.
I mean, what would the charges be? Did he hit you or threaten your life? Do you have any viable evidence?

I would forget that and move on, but again, just my opinion.
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Thats the way I am leaning.
 
Lynchburg14 said:
So I get to school today and one of the AP's pulls me to the side to tell me that the student I wrote up yesterday, dad has called and want to speak to me. His son apparently went home and told the dad that "I put my hands on him several times". I looked at the AP and said are serious. He tells me yes. So I told him that is a bunch of BS that I never touched the kid. So he has me call the dad but I got his voice mail and left a message. Well I come out of the locker room with my 8th graders and the dad and the kid are in the middle of the gym. I walk up and ask what is going on and he says he is hear to talk to me. I told him that he would have to wait that I was ending class right now. I asked him how he was doing and he says "How the hell do you think I am doing, you put your hands on my son". My 8th graders looked at me and asked what was this guy talking about.

I come back from lunch and try to discuss what is going on and let this dad know I did not "put my hands on his son". He is aggressive in tone of voice and body language from the get go. Every time I tried to talk he keep interrupting me. I finally told him to stop talking and let me explain the situation. He then gets in my face chest to chest and is now yelling at me and cussing me out, all in front of his kid. As he is doing this he is spiting in my face. I did not move and keep telling him he needed to calm down and that I would not have this argument with him. He then puts his arms out to the side and tells me we can end this right now, trying to fight me. I told him that I was going to go get the school officer and he would leave in handcuffs. He keep on cussing me out as I walked away. I found the security officer and had him come and get the parent.

I was then called down to the principle office and she ask if I am okay and if I want to press chargers. To be honest I thought about it but don't really feel like dealing with it down the road and having to go to court etc. Then she tells me that she needs me to come in and discuss the allegations tomorrow morning and that they may put me on admin leave depending on the findings WTF. What happen to having the back of your teachers. My wife said I should contact HR and tell them what happen and that I do not feel safe working there. This guy could have seriously hurt me and should not have been allowed down to my classroom without supervision.

Your thoughts?
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This is definitely the suckiest part of teaching. There are way too many parents out there now who operate on the belief that their little darlings never lie. Somehow administration has backed that - it's easier to roll over in the face of angry (and powerful) parents. Like others have said, document EVERYTHING. When something like this happens, as quickly as you can, write down your recollections & try to get conversations verbatim.

The other thing I always try to do is never be in a room alone with a student. If they come for help, I make sure it's in a place where other adults are in view. I guess I was lucky that my eyes were opened early when a friend of mine was doing his student teaching in a middle school & he had a girl tell him to his face that she was going to accuse him of sexually assaulting her so she could sue him.

Good luck & let us know how it turns out. And try to stay positive. The kids need as many good role models as possible these days, and you never really know who you are having a profound influence on (or how many).
 
Dang man that sucks. That's pretty bad the way your school handled it. I don't know what I'd do about the charges. Usually I wouldn't do anything in that situation because it's not worth the hassle, but then I think there's a ton of douche parents/people like this guy nowadays that get away with this crap. So part of me would want to give him what he deserves. And since he gave his son a front row seat to his charades, it could teach the kid you can't do crap like that and expect to not see repercussions.
 
That is a tough situation to have to deal with, nothing worse than unfounded allegations but unfortunately with the way society is today it seems to be happening more and more

Hope it all gets resolved the right way and you don't have any lasting problems arising from it

Jman said:
Some schools are already placing cameras and microphones IN classrooms to check on and review teachers. To me, that would be the day I tell big brother to kiss my ass and I'm out of education.
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I completely understand that view and to an extent I do agree with you, but with the things that happen these days those cameras should be used for security purposes and as evidence for instances like this, not for checking up on teachers
 
This is an unfortunate situation, and it truly sucks. Having a sister and brother in law who teach, I hear all sorts of crap and would never do it myself. As for the body cameras, I know a lot of police departments are making their officers buy them... If I were a teacher I would strongly consider one of the school district decided it would not pose any legal issues.
 
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