Badger_Golfer
Well-known member
That makes sense. Whats funny though is that women seem like they dont like it if a guy wants to spend a lot of time with them, yet they get mad if a guy doesnt hang out with them all the time.It's not that at all. You're probably comparing two different variables: manners are great but can't replace everything else. Having manners and not getting the girl are not directly* related.
(*Directly is not the word I'm looking for, but I can't think right now, I'm stuffed up in the head and sick.)
Perhaps a problem is that nice guys don't make girls feel chased, desired, give them that thrill. They're too available, too doormat-y, and it's not really fun.
I have myself a nice guy that I found, I asked out, I did everything for. Now we're together and all, and he's still nice, but it's tough knowing that he's never really been fired up about being with me and that he wouldn't even be with me had I not done everything...yeah, that's my great love story. Great, isn't it.
The guy who says "maybe I'll call" and you wait the whole time nervously and at the end of that third day he does call...that's a butterfly moment. Knowing he's busy and has his own life but that he makes time for you is exciting. If he has no life but the one centered on you, what about that makes it seem like he as a lot to offer? Harsh maybe but the way it is.
I dunno man, love is crazy and Im not afraid to admit that I dont understand women at all.
Take my last girlfriend for example. She used to call me and text me all the time (I mean at least 3-5 times a day, plus we worked together, so we had lunch together at work every day and she used to text me "goodnight" every night. Thats not to say that I didnt text her and call her, but not as often as she texted/called me) and then towards the end she told me that I was too clingy and that she wanted a little more space. Then, when I gave her space and only asked her to do stuff with me one day a week, she complained that I never called her and that I was too distant. Then, when I told her, "Well, you told me you wanted space. Why would I call you all the time? I figured I would give you space and thatt you would call me if you wanted to talk" and she basically told me thats not what she wanted and that I was an a-hole. It was like I was wrong no matter what I did. LOL :confused2: My ex never doubted that I was fired-up about being with her. I bought her a card and some scented candles for sweetest day (and she bought me cologne) and when we were together a month I bought her this really sweet card and wrote inside of it how happy I was to be with her and got her some flowers; so she never had any reason to doubt that I was happy to be with her.
Also, when we would go out on dates, she would get all dolled up (makeup, low-cut tops, tight pants) and when I would tell her that she looked pretty, she would call me a liar and say that she was fat and ugly. Like I said, I tried and I really liked the girl, but it was a no-win situation and she was convinced that I was too good for her and that it was only a matter of time before I found someone better and dumped her. Like I said, my ex was a nice girl, but she was kinda psycho and definetly has some issues that she needs to work out. Im sure she will be a great wife and mother someday, but it definetly doesnt look like she is the girl for me.
As far as not having a lot to offer, I own my own house, go to work every day, pay my bills, dont hang out at the bar all night, dont do drugs, and have good morals, good values, good manners and just want someone nice (I dont need a woman who looks like a supermodel in order to be happy) whom I can build a life with.
I guess the way I look at it, any woman who thinks that I dont have anything to offer probably isnt someone Id want to spend the rest of my life with anyways.
As much as Id love to have a girlfriend and maybe a wife and kids someday, it has to be the right girl and it has to be a good relationship, otherwise, whats the point? Im not going to settle for whoever I can get just because society says that there is something wrong with me if I dont someday get married and start a family.
If I end up being a bachelor all my life, so be it.
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