Mental Health: Make it a Priority

[CTRosarian]

I had a friend who lost both of his legs a couple weeks ago after a severe illness. As long as I've known him they only sort of worked and got around on crutches.
He seems to be taking it amazingly well, perhaps because the "impostor" issues are gone. Now people think, you poor thing, how can I help you?

I bring this up because unless we can see it, our society often discounts issues it can't see. Mental health doesn't get the respect it needs.

 

[Just_Brad]

So I scheduled a call with my workplace EFAP (whatever the f**k that means), in effect our counselling services offered through the workplace.

Appointment by phone was for 10:30 am this morning. It is now 10:43 and I haven't received my call yet.

 

[PPFour12]

So I scheduled a call with my workplace EFAP (whatever the f**k that means), in effect our counselling services offered through the workplace.

Appointment by phone was for 10:30 am this morning. It is now 10:43 and I haven't received my call yet.

Ugh. That’s frustrating.

I have an appointment today at 1:15. First time I’ve seen someone in person in about a year or so.

 

[Just_Brad]

Ugh. That’s frustrating.

I have an appointment today at 1:15. First time I’ve seen someone in person in about a year or so.

I would 100 % prefer to see someone in person, but for some reason that isn't an option. Even to manage a phone call it took like 5 attempts. Way to make mental health issues ******* difficult to get assistance with.

 

[AnthonyC]

So I scheduled a call with my workplace EFAP (whatever the f**k that means), in effect our counselling services offered through the workplace.

Appointment by phone was for 10:30 am this morning. It is now 10:43 and I haven't received my call yet.

That's BS and if you have the opportunity, file a grievance. If not for you, the next person.

 

[Daluteh]

So I scheduled a call with my workplace EFAP (whatever the f**k that means), in effect our counselling services offered through the workplace.

Appointment by phone was for 10:30 am this morning. It is now 10:43 and I haven't received my call yet.

I don't know what the F stands for but EAP is very commonly Employee Assistance Program for most organizations.

 

[Daluteh]

I would 100 % prefer to see someone in person, but for some reason that isn't an option. Even to manage a phone call it took like 5 attempts. Way to make mental health issues ******* difficult to get assistance with.

The shortage is terrible. There's no place local to me that is accepting in person sessions currently, all through online programs like Better Health. It makes it difficult to connect my staff with the support they want, when they want to have a conversation with someone face to face and their only option is to do it online or over the phone they do not feel valued or taken seriously. It's the stigma that people multi-task too much in those scenario's that I most commonly get for feedback.

 

[Davidhibler]

I'm spiraling, kids.
I don't need anything. Just had to say something.

 

[PPFour12]

I'm spiraling, kids.
I don't need anything. Just had to say something.

Hang in there. You got this.

 

[wadesworld]

I would 100 % prefer to see someone in person, but for some reason that isn't an option. Even to manage a phone call it took like 5 attempts. Way to make mental health issues ******* difficult to get assistance with.

Ok, rant time:

Mental health is definitely a big issue in this country. Everyone says "make it a priority" - and you should. However, have you ever tried getting mental health treatment?

"Hi, something's really wrong with my Mom. I'm VERY concerned about her. When can someone see her?"

"Oh, Dr Smith's first availability is February 4th."

"February 4th? You gotta be kidding me. Look, this is no routine counseling session. She needs HELP. "

"Oh, I understand. Let me see what heaven and Earth I can move......hmm...I can get her in on Feb 1st, would that help? Or, I could refer you to a good friend of Dr Smith, Dr Jones."

"Ok, let's try that. Surely Dr Jones will want to help."

"Ok, here's the number, but I'll warn you Dr Jones is not accepting new patients."

"WTF! I'll stay with Dr Smith then."

"Great, I'll send you a 40-page questionnaire to fill out which we won't read. Dr. Smith's rate is $450 an hour, and we don't do insurance. You'll probably also be prescribed medication which requires prior authorization, but since we refuse to do insurance, you're out-of-luck and will have to pay $350 a refill out-of-pocket."

The "you-get-what-you-get and we don't care whether you like it or not" attitude of the mental health profession is truly abhorrent. While I'm generally not a fan of more regulations, this is one area I'll go against my normal views. We need more treatment facilities and we need standards of care all providers must meet to keep their license.

 

[Just_Brad]

Well, I finally got the call, an hour later than scheduled, and I thought it was good.
I wasn't expecting answers, and definitely didn't get any, but got a way to adjust my thinking, how to approach things differently, and hopefully see if it helps to make situations better.

Would I still prefer to see someone in person, and build more of a relationship? Definitely.

 

[PPFour12]

Well, I finally got the call, an hour later than scheduled, and I thought it was good.
I wasn't expecting answers, and definitely didn't get any, but got a way to adjust my thinking, how to approach things differently, and hopefully see if it helps to make situations better.

Would I still prefer to see someone in person, and build more of a relationship? Definitely.

I had been doing virtual and it helps. But, yeah, after having an in-person today it’s definitely a huge difference. I hope you can get it arranged.

 

[GUYDON]

Not to get too personal but I had a very abusive childhood. Went on to serve 2 tours in Iraq in the infantry. I had extreme ptsd when I returned. I delt with nonstop insomnia, debilitating panic attacks, explosive anger crippling depression. VA put me on meds which helped at first but then made things much worse for me. The counseling was an absolute joke in my case, just I tried over and over. I suffered for almost 2 decades.
I mostly just gritted my teeth and pushed through, acting like nothing was wrong while I would have to drink a 12 pack every night jist to fall asleep.
Then a miracle happened for me. I found Meditations by Marcus Aurelius. That book and the writings of Epictetus changed my life forever. After 20 years of searching and suffering I had the answer. I have since given that book to many veterans and it has had the same effect for them.
The base of this thinking is only control what you can control, the only thing you can control is the purity of your thoughts. Everything else is going to happen the way it happens reguardless of how you feel about it. The past is the past and cant be changed, let it go. Man is a creature of logic, it is our super power, use it. Things that happen are niether good nor bad, they are just nature. Everything that happens, has happened to someone else, and will happen again. It is our judgment about those things that haunt us, not the thing itself. Every man will die, but not every man will die complaining. Everything in your life is rented, meaning temporary. None of it belongs to you, treat it that way, and as if you need to return it in good condition. Be willing to let things go, the same way that came.
The stoic philosophy is an amazing healing tool and a very satisfying way to live you life.

 

[Junkyard]

Ok, rant time:

Mental health is definitely a big issue in this country. Everyone says "make it a priority" - and you should. However, have you ever tried getting mental health treatment?

"Hi, something's really wrong with my Mom. I'm VERY concerned about her. When can someone see her?"

"Oh, Dr Smith's first availability is February 4th."

"February 4th? You gotta be kidding me. Look, this is no routine counseling session. She needs HELP. "

"Oh, I understand. Let me see what heaven and Earth I can move......hmm...I can get her in on Feb 1st, would that help? Or, I could refer you to a good friend of Dr Smith, Dr Jones."

"Ok, let's try that. Surely Dr Jones will want to help."

"Ok, here's the number, but I'll warn you Dr Jones is not accepting new patients."

"WTF! I'll stay with Dr Smith then."

"Great, I'll send you a 40-page questionnaire to fill out which we won't read. Dr. Smith's rate is $450 an hour, and we don't do insurance. You'll probably also be prescribed medication which requires prior authorization, but since we refuse to do insurance, you're out-of-luck and will have to pay $350 a refill out-of-pocket."

The "you-get-what-you-get and we don't care whether you like it or not" attitude of the mental health profession is truly abhorrent. While I'm generally not a fan of more regulations, this is one area I'll go against my normal views. We need more treatment facilities and we need standards of care all providers must meet to keep their license.

Sadly this is too true. It has improved, but is still a far cry from where it needs to be.

There must be another option, no? Is there not a local community-service type group that does no-questions asked crisis type counseling? I mean, it's not the total solution, but if it bought you some time.....

I hope it works out for you

 

[wadesworld]

Sadly this is too true. It has improved, but is still a far cry from where it needs to be.

There must be another option, no? Is there not a local community-service type group that does no-questions asked crisis type counseling? I mean, it's not the total solution, but if it bought you some time.....

I hope it works out for you

My rant was fictional, but based upon real situations I've seen happen either through family or friends. Definitely needs a lot of improvement.

 

[AndyL0711]

my commute is really starting to get to me. being away from my wife and dauhgter 4 days a week is making me feel alone. it is not helping my anixety and stress right now.

i know i can be a pain in the ass on here sometimes but i thank God i get to post on this site, it helps me more than a can say.

 

[Canadan]

my commute is really starting to get to me. being away from my wife and dauhgter 4 days a week is making me feel alone. it is not helping my anixety and stress right now.

i know i can be a pain in the ass on here sometimes but i thank God i get to post on this site, it helps me more than a can say.

Hang in there, dude. Glad THP can be a bit of peace.

 

[Sean]

I had a friend who lost both of his legs a couple weeks ago after a severe illness. As long as I've known him they only sort of worked and got around on crutches.
He seems to be taking it amazingly well, perhaps because the "impostor" issues are gone. Now people think, you poor thing, how can I help you?

I bring this up because unless we can see it, our society often discounts issues it can't see. Mental health doesn't get the respect it needs.

There has always been a stigma attached to people with mental health issues. For the most part, people with a mental illness are seen as lacking.

 

[Inioch]

my commute is really starting to get to me. being away from my wife and dauhgter 4 days a week is making me feel alone. it is not helping my anixety and stress right now.

i know i can be a pain in the ass on here sometimes but i thank God i get to post on this site, it helps me more than a can say.

As @Canadan said, hang in there. I know some of how you feel. I'm away 3-9 days in a stretch, home for 2-4 days and then away again. And feeling quite lacking when I'm around and lonely when not.

THP helps a ton! Not even always posting, but reading and following the concersation and banter. And at the same time knowing, there's a sympathetic ear around whenever it's needed.

 

[Glftips]

It is healthy that many here are able to identify how the feel and what ma be causing it. You are not alone as anxiety and depression are common today. I would recommend seeing a professional who will help you by working with you to develop strategies and ways to cope with the stress. I was a psychotherapist (Ph.D.) for 25 years. If you are suffering please know that you can get through it with help. Your primary care physician can refer you.

 

[Just_Brad]

I got hurt at work almost a month ago. Range of motion went to almost nothing in my left wrist. Pain no matter how I moved it. Then it would get better, come back again, disappear for a while.

Mentally, i was just spiralling, all over the place. What if it was broken, sprained, worse.....

It got really sore again and I had enough. To the doctor to get it checked (which I didnt do before because I was stupid and the timing was terrible). Prescribed some drugs, a wrist brace, physio.

Finally called to setup physio, and got asked a simple question: why did you wait so long?

I thought I was fine, that I could just man up and get through it. How frigging stupid is that.

 

[Junkyard]

I got hurt at work almost a month ago. Range of motion went to almost nothing in my left wrist. Pain no matter how I moved it. Then it would get better, come back again, disappear for a while.

Mentally, i was just spiralling, all over the place. What if it was broken, sprained, worse.....

It got really sore again and I had enough. To the doctor to get it checked (which I didnt do before because I was stupid and the timing was terrible). Prescribed some drugs, a wrist brace, physio.

Finally called to setup physio, and got asked a simple question: why did you wait so long?

I thought I was fine, that I could just man up and get through it. How frigging stupid is that.

Nothing to be ashamed of, that just shows you're as normal as the rest of us.

The sad truth of it is that as long as you waited for a wrist injury, people with MH issues wait three to four times as long before seeking help, because we think we can fix it on our own. Not belittling what you're going through, but that's a big deal and it needs to change.

Here's hoping the wrist clears up soon!

 

[jbb2388]

That's the part that I'm the worst at............

I've been......skeptical(?) of the profession. I'm not sure that I would be "receptive", I guess, is the best way that I can put it. The medication thing scares the sh!t out of me, too.

I've always been a "suffer in silence" type. In fact, I've done it so much for so long that even I don't know when it's getting "too dark". When my family notices, then I know it's getting "bad". They're noticing.........

Just got done reading this thread. Never paid attention to it previously. Brother its shocking how accurately that describes me. Up until 4 years ago I had been in and out of therapy and on and off meds for 6-7 years following a divorce in 2011 and am as cynical as they come towards the system. Refused to become a part of it again. Well, this essentially just cost me a four year relationship with my significant other that was the best thing that ever happened to me and I have no idea how I am going to recover. When I met her it changed my life and now I am back to square one. Not many pleasant thoughts going through my head these last few days.

 

[Inioch]

Just got done reading this thread. Never paid attention to it previously. Brother its shocking how accurately that describes me. Up until 4 years ago I had been in and out of therapy and on and off meds for 6-7 years following a divorce in 2011 and am as cynical as they come towards the system. Refused to become a part of it again. Well, this essentially just cost me a four year relationship with my significant other that was the best thing that ever happened to me and I have no idea how I am going to recover. When I met her it changed my life and now I am back to square one. Not many pleasant thoughts going through my head these last few days.

Really sorry to hear this. Don't know how much help I can be, but the line is always open if you want it. Please try not to stay alone with the thoughts

 

[Sean]

I got hurt at work almost a month ago. Range of motion went to almost nothing in my left wrist. Pain no matter how I moved it. Then it would get better, come back again, disappear for a while.

Mentally, i was just spiralling, all over the place. What if it was broken, sprained, worse.....

It got really sore again and I had enough. To the doctor to get it checked (which I didnt do before because I was stupid and the timing was terrible). Prescribed some drugs, a wrist brace, physio.

Finally called to setup physio, and got asked a simple question: why did you wait so long?

I thought I was fine, that I could just man up and get through it. How frigging stupid is that.

I used to work through an injury first, and it cost me: the most serious ones were a heart attack, and the second was a knee fracture. I thought the former was just bad indigestion and ignored it, the second was I kept playing and it would sort itself out. It didn't, and over a few weeks I just exacerbated it. Now, I listen to what my body is telling me.