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i like to try to be the voice of the other side, the voice of the slow. i have tried to change some of my ways to speed up, but i probably still have a long ways to go.
what would i have done? beyond respectful reminders regarding the pace and maintaining good readiness etiquette, nothing. i would never just leave a group.
do i believe anyone believes they are slow? i had to be told i was slow, so no, i don't think anyone knows they are slow until it's pointed out to them.
but i will say this: i have done some experiments although on a relatively small sample, and many - maybe even most though can't say all - people who identify as fast are not any faster than those they accuse of being slow. i've timed them and compared their time to my time. the most i've seen is 3 seconds per shot. that includes the time from it being someone's turn to the time they are either back in their cart or stepped off the tee for the next person. if i shoot 90, that's 5 minutes over 18 holes.
the slow play i have seen is a mainly two reasons. the social aspect is probably the biggest. people telling stories on the tee boxes and greens, or sitting in their carts talking instead of getting out to hit a shot. the second biggest reason i see is looking for errant shots when there are a lot of errant shots. i don't believe that using a laser or taking a handful of practice swings is the biggest reason for slow play. those take a few seconds at most, and the math (as i understand it) just doesn't support this being the reason for a 3.5 hour round ballooning to a 5 hour round.
Its never pre shot routine that is slow by itself. That can add 5-10 minutes per round.
Time spent on greens. Watching each of the 4 shoot in order before going to ball. Getting a distance without having any clubs in hand and having to walk back, looking for balls, etc. All of these things add 5-10 minutes or so. Then Add them up and you are at 30 minutes behind. Then add that every person behind you is playing catch up and all of the sudden 30 minutes behind is 45 minutes behind.
To give you an example, I play fast. Too fast. I can assure anybody that without feeling rushed in any way, the difference is more than a few seconds between their routine from start to finish and mine. That does not make my way right, just different and faster. But slow play is not about the person or group playing slow. Its about what it does to the course.
Courses get the blame (as do the players), but in this instance, what else could the course have done? They did everything right, and sadly one twosome ruined the day of golf for the other 100 that were set to play.