The dad joke thread

fairwaynut

Bettinardi Aficionado
Albatross 2021 Club
Joined
Aug 8, 2019
Messages
5,738
Reaction score
5,417
Location
Naperville, Il
Handicap
SingleMalt
have you heard about the new restaurant called Karma?

There is no menu: You get what you deserve.
 

J.B. Cobb III

J.C. 3 Stix
Albatross 2021 Club
Joined
Oct 11, 2018
Messages
8,460
Reaction score
6,187
Location
Wilmywood
Handicap
26
An old lady walked into the bank and asked me if I could help her check her balance. So I pushed her over.
 

J.B. Cobb III

J.C. 3 Stix
Albatross 2021 Club
Joined
Oct 11, 2018
Messages
8,460
Reaction score
6,187
Location
Wilmywood
Handicap
26
The thief who stole my iPhone should face time.
 

fairwaynut

Bettinardi Aficionado
Albatross 2021 Club
Joined
Aug 8, 2019
Messages
5,738
Reaction score
5,417
Location
Naperville, Il
Handicap
SingleMalt
How do dog catchers get paid?

By the pound.
 

donny475

You can call me SteakSauce
Albatross 2021 Club
Joined
Mar 2, 2011
Messages
6,037
Reaction score
3,706
Location
Texas
Handicap
10.3
My friend who went bald 20 years a go still carries and old comb around with him.........
He can't part with it
 

X.Man

Well-known member
Joined
Dec 21, 2011
Messages
8,682
Reaction score
1,167
Location
Miami, FL
Handicap
GHIN 13.5
D30B7712-7A51-4BF0-9FB8-ED3F888DB9A4.jpeg
 

J.B. Cobb III

J.C. 3 Stix
Albatross 2021 Club
Joined
Oct 11, 2018
Messages
8,460
Reaction score
6,187
Location
Wilmywood
Handicap
26
What do you call a woman who sets fire to all her bills ? Bernadette.
 

fairwaynut

Bettinardi Aficionado
Albatross 2021 Club
Joined
Aug 8, 2019
Messages
5,738
Reaction score
5,417
Location
Naperville, Il
Handicap
SingleMalt
What do you say to a skeleton going on vacation?

Bone Voyage.
 

fairwaynut

Bettinardi Aficionado
Albatross 2021 Club
Joined
Aug 8, 2019
Messages
5,738
Reaction score
5,417
Location
Naperville, Il
Handicap
SingleMalt
What was the name of the roundest Knight at King Arthur's table?

Sir Circumference.
 

J.B. Cobb III

J.C. 3 Stix
Albatross 2021 Club
Joined
Oct 11, 2018
Messages
8,460
Reaction score
6,187
Location
Wilmywood
Handicap
26
You gotta hand it to short people. Because they cant reach it.
 

donny475

You can call me SteakSauce
Albatross 2021 Club
Joined
Mar 2, 2011
Messages
6,037
Reaction score
3,706
Location
Texas
Handicap
10.3
Remember when getting Air at the gas station
was free?

now its 1.50? WHY




inflation
 

donny475

You can call me SteakSauce
Albatross 2021 Club
Joined
Mar 2, 2011
Messages
6,037
Reaction score
3,706
Location
Texas
Handicap
10.3
Shout out to whom ever created the word, "Plethora"


it means a lot
 

donny475

You can call me SteakSauce
Albatross 2021 Club
Joined
Mar 2, 2011
Messages
6,037
Reaction score
3,706
Location
Texas
Handicap
10.3
Two Blondes walk into a building........



you would have thought one of them would have seen it......
 

J.B. Cobb III

J.C. 3 Stix
Albatross 2021 Club
Joined
Oct 11, 2018
Messages
8,460
Reaction score
6,187
Location
Wilmywood
Handicap
26
(At my boss’s funeral kneeling and whispering at coffin)
"Who's thinking outside the box now Gary?"
 

Snickerdog

Team THP 2019 Grandaddy Alumni
Albatross 2021 Club
Joined
Dec 8, 2015
Messages
28,775
Reaction score
20,509
Location
KS
Handicap
3.6

Tywithay

Well-known member
Albatross 2021 Club
Joined
Nov 5, 2012
Messages
1,315
Reaction score
673
Location
Wichita, KS
Handicap
Golf
IMG_3340.jpg
 

J.B. Cobb III

J.C. 3 Stix
Albatross 2021 Club
Joined
Oct 11, 2018
Messages
8,460
Reaction score
6,187
Location
Wilmywood
Handicap
26
My wife tells me I have 2 major faults,
I don't listen - and something else.
 

Tevenor

The 2021 Grandaddy!
Albatross 2021 Club
Joined
Nov 17, 2019
Messages
5,645
Reaction score
6,483
Location
Upstate NY
Handicap
7ish
Just found out my grandfather is addicted to Viagra. Nobody is taking it harder than my grandmother.
 

fairwaynut

Bettinardi Aficionado
Albatross 2021 Club
Joined
Aug 8, 2019
Messages
5,738
Reaction score
5,417
Location
Naperville, Il
Handicap
SingleMalt
Why did the dinosaur cross the road?

Because the Chicken joke wasn't invented yet.
 

fairwaynut

Bettinardi Aficionado
Albatross 2021 Club
Joined
Aug 8, 2019
Messages
5,738
Reaction score
5,417
Location
Naperville, Il
Handicap
SingleMalt
What are the strongest days of the week?

Saturday and Sunday, because the rest are weak days.
 

J.B. Cobb III

J.C. 3 Stix
Albatross 2021 Club
Joined
Oct 11, 2018
Messages
8,460
Reaction score
6,187
Location
Wilmywood
Handicap
26
Everyone knows Albert Einstein was a genius, but his brother, Frank, is a monster!
 

fairwaynut

Bettinardi Aficionado
Albatross 2021 Club
Joined
Aug 8, 2019
Messages
5,738
Reaction score
5,417
Location
Naperville, Il
Handicap
SingleMalt
Did you hear about the sensitive burglar?

He takes things personally.
 

WMac19

Well-known member
Joined
Jan 21, 2011
Messages
6,175
Reaction score
883
Location
Clayton, NC
Handicap
4.8
What do you do with an elephant with 3 balls?

...you walk him and pitch to the rhino.


(Stolen from a scene from the old Hot Shots! movie with Charlie Sheen)
 

Welcome to The Hackers Paradise

Don't just play golf, live it!

Register Log in
Top