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Would like to hear some opinions

Smithfaced

Smithfaced

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It is very rare that I ask for opinions on stuff like this from anyone which I know is stupid but I've grown to really appreciate what the members here have to offer not just in golf but in life. Some of you know my background going to school as a "PGM" student at Campbell University. The end state of the program is being a PGA Professional and having a B.S. in business administration. Over my Christmas break I have been starting to really question staying at the school.

One major concern of mine is that my daughter lives 3 hours away. I make the 6 hour round trip drive 4 times a week (not an exaggeration) so I can spend time with her. I don't know that I could keep that up for 3 1/2 more years. My other concern is that I feel like playing and practicing has become a job. There is so much more pressure to play well that it just isn't as fun anymore. I went out the other day with the intent of bettering myself for the MC and had an absolute blast. Don't get me wrong, the MC has pressure to play well attached to it in a major way but it's a different feeling. I hope that makes sense.

I went into the program because I am very passionate about golf and I thought I wanted to teach golf. I know longer have a passion to teach which is the main reason most guys become PGA Professionals. The solutions I've been considering have been to leave Campbell and go to a school closer to Charlotte and major in something that I would have enjoy doing. Marketing, web design and interactive media, maybe even architecture. Technology based might be the direction I'm headed.

The way I see it is that I will always be able to play golf with or without a PGM program and I could still get a job in golf if I wanted but doing what I want to do, not teaching. This sounds like a bit of a midlife crisis going on here but I'm really just at a crossroads and would love to hear some opinions. You guys rock, thanks!
 
I think you need to weigh the options buddy. I know it's a burden now, but will the burden pay off in the long run? Will leaving school now afford you the same options later down the road?

It may be easier to make a change now, but will it be something you regret?
 
Some say if you love golf don't make it your living, unless you love teaching. Most pros I know barely get to play themselves
 
One thing I will add real quick is that education will be involved in whatever I decide to do. The GI Bill is paying for me to go to college and I intend on using that benefit completely.
 
I went through a similar situation but went all the way through and was an assistant pro for three years before it burnt me out. I took a couple of years away from the game and then went into the retail side of golf. I still get to be around the game, but I work 40-45 hours per week and have time to play and hit balls. I still get to help people get the correct clubs and be involved in the game and stay current on clubs.

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First of all, it sounds trite and over used, but DO WHAT YOU LOVE! Life is too short and if you no longer feel the love for your chosen path, change it while you have the chance and the impact of change will be smaller. Kudos for recognizing the change of heart too. Finally, family is very important and you will never regret doing what is in the best interest of your little girl.

You got this! Run with it I say!

JM
 
It sounds like you are already getting "burned out" with golf. It might be partially due to your schedule, but I have talked to many that used to be in the golf industry and have moved on to something else for the following reasons: income potential, lack of time to play golf, dealing with pampered golfer, etc. I say evaluate your situation and decide what you really want to do with your life, it sounds like being closer to Charlotte would at least make things a little easier for you.
 
I'm going through a shockingly similar situation myself right now, and what I've decided to do is make my decision based on 3 important questions:

1) What is going to be the best way to take care of my family in the future?
2) Is there a good future in job prospects?
3) Am I going to be doing something that, ultimately, I can do happily for the rest of my working life (including the process of getting there)?

IMO, if you answer all 3 of these things with the same area of education/career path, that was all you needed to make a decision. Best of luck on any decision you make and there is no wrong one. I'd be happy to talk with you anytime about it!
 
Move closer to Charlotte and enjoy your baby girl. She won't be young long and you will regret not being closer to her during those years. Charlotte is a big town and should have all the educational/career opportunities you need.
 
Jordan, as someone who doesn't have a child of their own but is a step-dad of sorts I can understand the wanting to move closer to your daughter. I see the toll and pain that not being closer to her daughter that it puts on Kristen on at times and I feel so bad for her. So I think that is very noble of you. And she is only 2 hours away..

As to the school part of your question, I would say leave. And I'm generally a person who says chase your dreams till you can't do it anymore or fail more times than the next person. But if you have lost your passion for it and its taking away from your ability to be a father to your daughter when you complete the program you might not feel as fulfilled from it as you hoped. And you may harbor bad feelings towards the job because you may feel that it took time away from your daughter. I didn't chase some dreams I had coming out of high school and I look back and regret some of those, but thats because I didn't even try. You have tried it and are doing it, and finding out that its not what you hoped it would be, theres nothing long with that. At least you chased it and gave it a shot. I'm now trying to chase some of mine, and its really hard at this point in my life, but thats my fault.

Golf will always be there for you as long as its fun to you. It sounds like its becoming un-fun and more job-like. If thats not your goal for golf, then you need to find a way to make more fun and less job-like. If leave the program will golf become more fun? Thats a question you have to ask. Also will I regret not working through the program 5-10 years from now. Its sounds like you have some fall back things you enjoy doing and working on so it eases the transition a little bit.

In the end you have to do what is best for you and your daughter. From the time I spent with you your daughter has a great dad and I know that you will make the choice that is right thing for you to do.
 
Simply, do what makes you happy. You cannot put a price on peace of mind.

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This is why I came on here and asked guys. I think I know in my heart what I need to do for my daughter and for myself. This is a big decision for me and it's always nice to hear what wiser men than I think about certain situations. I'm certainly not burned out on golf I'm just burned out on golfing on someone else's terms. Thanks for all the input so far!
 
lmh3 said:
I went through a similar situation but went all the way through and was an assistant pro for three years before it burnt me out. I took a couple of years away from the game and then went into the retail side of golf. I still get to be around the game, but I work 40-45 hours per week and have time to play and hit balls. I still get to help people get the correct clubs and be involved in the game and stay current on clubs.

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I have heard similar stories quite often. A good friend of mine got through the PGM program and landed an assistant spot that made all of his peers jealous. Super nice and well respected golf club. Long story short he's a graduate assistant now working on his masters and doesn't think he wants to work in golf anymore.
 
Smithfaced said:
This is why I came on here and asked guys. I think I know in my heart what I need to do for my daughter and for myself. This is a big decision for me and it's always nice to hear what wiser men than I think about certain situations. I'm certainly not burned out on golf I'm just burned out on golfing on someone else's terms. Thanks for all the input so far!
Click to expand...

You'll make the right decision buddy. I considered going into the golf industry much the same as you, but after talking to the pros at my course who rarely play, I realized it was more my love for golf driving me than a need to work in the industry.

I'm excited to follow along with your career path. It's awesome your GI bill will support it.
 
The only thing I would say that if it's an option take a semester off. See if the passion and desire to be a PGA professional is still there. If it isn't then you have your answer.

I know family comes first and it's tough with the commute you described, but if the benefits will be greater in the end you have to consider that also.

Lastly I will say trust your faith and see where that leads you. Sometimes the right decision isn't always the easiest and it takes patience.

I hope you find the answer because it sounds like you will be a great teacher.
 
That weekly drive and being away from your daughter have to be a killer. I'm sure you've heard it a million times but you'll enjoy your life much better if you are doing something that you'll enjoy. Make a list of pros and cons of staying at your current school and program versus transferring to a school and a different degree in the Charlotte area. If you do transfer spend time finding the school that will take the most of your credit already earned.
 
Would like to hear some opinions

Smithface,
First off its awesome to see another Camel on THP. Went to pharmacy school for two years back in 2004. While Campbell may have an awesome PGM school, it must be difficult as ever being away from your daughter. Not to mention there isn't much to do around Campbell Univ in the first place. I travel four days a week and I hate being away from my little girl.

I guess your decision hinges on several factors. However not to sway your decision or not, my second cousin is a PGA Professional. It was not long ago that I was about too make the same journey as you. My cousin said if you love playing golf as a sport, being a professional and teaching will take the fun out of playing. Golf is no longer a sport or hobby, it is your job. For me I didn't want to lose the passion to be play or be forced to pass up a round to teach. Hence I followed a career in pharmacy.

Anyhow I am sure you will make the right decision to support your family and little girl. Follow your heart.

Good luck and don't hesitate to reach out if you need anything or just feel like talking!
 
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Big life choices are always hard, and those choices should be done by your heart, but not lightheartedly. There's many methods on how to think it trough, but the most important thing is that a decision is made, and you once you've made that decision you'll know it's the right one. I know this doesn't help you, but as long as you make a decision you cannot fail. You can keep the status quo but that can be done with you deciding anything, so you need to make a decision to stay there or leave.

My daughter means the world to me, and I'm going trough a helluva rough time at the moment personally, and she's what is keeping me together. I know for damn sure that there's nothing more important to you than your little girl. There's nothing you wouldn't do for her and that pretty much makes every other thing secondary. Life isn't about money, work or something trivial like hobbies, it's about you and the people around you. Make yourself happy, and your happiness will spread.

I can't give you anything to choose from one or the other, but being unhappy and close to you daughter isn't any better than being happy and seeing her as often as possible but driving from a distance. You sure don't sound happy now, and you've got a chance to an education secured.

It's a tough call, but I'm sure you will know the answer when you look in to your heart.



A slightly more lighthearted method, but this works surprisingly often :

Toss a coin. I know, it sounds stupid, but here's the point. When you face any difficult choice, toss a coin, when you see the result, if you feel like you need to have another go at it (a voice in your head goes, best of three right?) you will know what you really want to do.
 
A good friend of mine, while we were both in the Air Force, took up golf and got really good, really fast. He eventually left the Air Force (after 11 years) to pursue golfing and teaching. He became a teaching pro and moved to Charleston. Fast forward to today and he has long ago given up teaching and only plays for fun now. He now owns an auto garage in Summerville. He absolutely regrets leaving he Air Force early, and found that teaching wasn't what he thought it would be and that it actually drove him from the game. Only in the last 4 years or so has he gotten back into it heavily.

I think what Zenger said sums up my buddy's situation. He didn't love the teaching part of it, just the thrill of getting the title and calling golf your job.

And I hate him because he can not play for two months, play with a borrowed set of clubs on MY course and still shoot a 78 and kick my arse.
 
After my first term of law school I knew it wasn't for me. I couldn't quit though - just isn't my nature to not finish something I start. I ended up with the degree and whatever cache may come with it but a ton of debt, a lot of personal misery and a different career. Was it worth it? No, I don't think so.

You have to decide for yourself but it reads like you have solid personal and professional reasons for making the change. If you had a semester or even year to go I could see sticking it out. But 3.5 more years for something you don't think you want to do? Boy, that's tough.
 
I'd bow out of the golf program if I was you. Golf industry is so saturated with PGA guys and the pay ceiling is very low...plenty of better ways to spend that free college I would imagine. Go be with your daughter, enjoy life.
 
Would like to hear some opinions

Jordan, you've got a life ahead of you to figure out the work and career path. If you were to go to something that could dove tail back into the golf industry at a later date. You only get one chance to be a daddy to your little girl. It's a investment of time and love that will pay you dividends for the rest of your life.

You've been in school a short period of time if I remember correctly, and the flash of being in the golf industry has faded a bit. Perhaps that's a telling sign as well.

Good luck bro!
 
Jordan when golf became a job for me, I walked away. I fell into a career and never liked backed. I don't regret it for a moment. I was single and able to make decisions in a vacuum.

You sir have a little one that needs her daddy. You have a degree to get and golf to keep on. Not to mention taking care of yourself. If the passion for teaching is gone is because your instructors aren't doing a great job or you have greater responsibilities on your plate.

The life of an instructor is hard at first but can blossom into something very special. The question is, are you willing to put in the time to get over the hump.

The life of a father can be trying but it's never boring and at the end of the day you know you can do it all again the next day. Your baby looks at you, holds your hand, giggles, cries and does what babies do.

A degree is always good to have in the back pocket. It makes you more marketable. And a happy Jordan is good for everyone. You have a greay head on your shoulders and will do what's best.
 
Jordan, based on the tone of your post, you already seem to be leaning towards quitting golf school, and I don't see anything wrong with that. I had a similar discussion with my wife several years ago when she was figuring out what she wanted to do. She loves to bake so I suggested she open a bakery, and she said that if she HAD to bake, then it would ruin the joy she gets from it. Family has to come first, and it sounds like you already know that.
 
Sounds like the passion to teach is gone so time to move on to another career choice that fuels your fire IMO. In regards to your child, I can speak from personal experience that it is best to be as close and spend as much time as possible with her. My previous marriage ended when my son was about 1. About 6 months later, I was offered a great advancement opportunity with my company but it moved me from Myrtle Beach to Largo, FL. I was road tripping or flying as often as possible (usually two weekends a month) but it was not near enough. I was also able to bring him to me for half of the summer. I got lucky and the guy who took my job in Myrtle Beach only lasted about a year and my company let me go back to take that job. The year away from being able to see him whenever I wanted was probably the worst year of my life and was full of regrets. Sorry to ramble on about my personal situation but if you are making that many trips to see her I am inclined to think you are feeling similar emotions to what I was feeling.

Best of luck in your decisions Jordan!
 
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